Leaderboard

Growing up as a male, you are expected to do male things such as the clothes you wear, your friends, your occupation, military service, drinking beer, hunting, fishing etc. It's not the activities for the most part, but the pressure to do them to conform. Why can't I wear women's underwear. Why can't I cry. Why can't I be accepted for who I am. Many years I went deer hunting, and underneath the blaze orange outerwear I wore a nice bra and panty set while in the deer blind. Talk about the perfect example what we should be able to do without the pressure of "being a man". Reminds me of the Lumberjack Song! -30-

Where did we go wrong? How did we devolve into such a state that simple education is threatened by bigots? History and science are all but gone from the entire curriculum. Kids today will have no clue what a chromosome is, or what the civil war was. This is one of the most sickening times in recent American memory. There was even a man who wanted to eliminate math for being “woke”, whatever that is. When I was a kid, they didn’t hold back. They told us what American history was like. And they didn’t use any tact. Now the mere mention of slavery and the civil war is cause for immediate firing and huge fines. It seems that we’re the only ones that are ruled by cowards that are so fragile that they will completely collapse over anything that could possibly make them uncomfortable. I don’t see this kind of fascist 🤬 happening anywhere else. At least not in the civilized world. I want to puke up stuff I ate when I was 6. This 🤬 enrages me so 🤬 bad that I want to throw out the most vicious vulgarities imaginable. At some point I’m sure I would even end up creating a few new ones. They want us to be both ignorant and stupid. This is what the “greatest country on earth” is doing to its citizens. This is the freedom we brag so heavily about. I’m ready to move to a shack in Saudi Arabia or North Korea where at least I know that I hold no value. Not somewhere that tries to cover it up with lies and full on deception.

I’m having a hell of a time getting my ex out of my mind. I don’t know why, but she’s in my mind constantly. I can’t get her out. We broke up more than 20 years ago. But she is invading my mind and thoughts all the time. I ended things because I caught her cheating on me. I was in love with her. She broke my heart. But the memories are like locusts. They violate my thoughts every day. I think “What if….” all the time. I don’t know how to get rid of her. Adrianne isn’t happy about it, but says she understands. The thing is that until a few years ago, she NEVER crossed my mind. She and I were engaged. But all of a sudden, I was thinking about her all the time. I have no clue why. Help?

What exactly am I looking for if, God forbid, I'm single again. Being 79 years old, my time is precious on this earth, but that does not mean I can't experience what I've wanted my whole life. Being a man has ment that I fought the battles, lead the charge, protected the family, was the bread winner and all of that. I would love a women that is 100% vested in our relationship and my transformation. A women that takes the lead in all aspects from day to day, to sex, to my transformation. We need to have a 50/50 relationship except her 50% is worth more than mine..lol. Throw out my mens underwear and replace it with women's bras, panties, etc.. Replace.my clothes with more feminine attire. Teach me how to use makeup. Teach me how to be a women. In return she will have my love, affection and respect. She will feel safe. She will be nurtured. We will sleep next to each other feeling the warmth of our bodies and smelling the essence of each other. Hold hands, kiss, caress... two women in love! - 30-

Why do I have this desire to become a women, I don't know. My father died when I was six, my mother was an unhappy alcoholic and married a weak useless man. Did these affect me, don't really care. I am living and dealing with this. When I was a freshman in high school I had my first and only homosexual experience with my best friend. Had no idea what I was doing but enjoyed pleasuring him. I dated two women that could have encouraged me to fulfill my needs, but I was such a fool I did not recognize the possibility. My dream would be to be with a women that would support me 100%; To help me become the women I want to be. -30-

I’m laying here in bed with Adrianne. We were talking, and I asked her what I’m going to ask here. Is it wrong of me to wish I had never come out, and just continued to live as a man? It would be so incredibly much easier, but a lot more miserable too. I just don’t know what to think. So is it wrong of me to wish I had kept it to myself. That would be easier…… right? I guess I’m just scared to death about all the 🤬 that is happening against us. I fear for our lives just checking the mail. We have a court date this week, and I’m scared they’re going to rule against us simply because I’m trans. I just don’t know what to do anymore. I can be who I really am, or pretend to be someone I’m not.