anunitu

feeling very empty this am,wondering why i am typing this at all,with the empty internet to freeze the words in place no reply because the bits do not exist as thought,only 1s and 0's counting the pulses of my breaking heart, no no,no one there at all,only the mirror of electronic static and random singing current in those wires all concern only a warm field of thought blooms that reach critical mass in the dark web,there to fall to the vast imaginings of reality with no solid vesture,only shadows running from themselves. well,no matter,the shadows can not escape,or i hope not. can darkness make a clam to my emotional fires,perhaps if i do not keep the watch tower in its open state. but shadows are not easy to keep hidden in their jails the chains all rusted and links broken now.those old demons might desire their old power to destroy again, i remember those days long ago as a war raged across the china seas. no i will not remember that i buried those long years gone bye. full stop now it hurts to remember.

my site with my writing: https://ko-fi.com/U7U2PBFF let me know what you think.

something i wrote when i was told i might write an erotic piece, so i wrote this. Evening and whispering touch Oh for dreams of this simple devotion, a touch of tender grace Soft rivulets of melting ice, across your alabaster skin And to a motion that could bring a moan, no deception in its flow Some juxtaposed desire, from your heated breath across my soul In semi dream like state, awash in mounting visions of an alter night For the wisdom made plain, with its hollow mouth touching in places sacred Is it but the stuff of dreams, this molten fevers biting touch And I relenting from the need, for a dangerous design of care. Anunitu (C) 2003

at times an image flickers ,the broken body of the dancer fallen from her pedestal when the tune was over at last and she attempted to return to the sadness she had escaped from to join the dance,but the sadness screamed to her you have been banished for abandoning your home for nothing more than a pleasure of your own truth. this the dark will not abide,go back to your dance of sadness,and become what is required to return to us,or slay that bright light you carry with you,it does not belong here in our presence,we only rule here in this place be as we tell you you are allowed to be. then perhaps we will allow you passage to the other side to that even darker place of permanent rest.

this describes me at times Break Flesh Secret passions that we claim Within this Sepulcher of pain Crossing cadence with the drum Halls of flesh now overcome Now the witness' find their place Upon this convoluted, spider trace Taking postulants on this stage Through the postures of their rage Freeing demons from their chains Striking down the last remains Of shepherds pinned upon the wall Between the pillars, standing tall Anunitu (C) 1998

there are days i wonder if i need to rethink what it means to exist as i am,will i find another path to break down other walls and find a bright room on the other side,or is it better to stay safe here alone in this dark and warm shadow of reality? i used to know the answer to this,but at 72 i have begun to once again ask questions with no answers concerning my expectations from life walls protect while caging us in our pain and fear,but as one book said,i have no mouth and i MUST SCREAM some days that is how i feel and i cannot even cry to make it better. will we sing and dance like monsters at the alter of our greed, to fall to the treasures great temptation only to find it just dross,not truth at all,but only more doubt?

i took a very deep look at your pic, i can see things other people do not,it has to do with a persons energy that can not be seen by most people, kind of like the aura concept,and it does show the deeper parts call them a soul vision. when we were chatting earlier today i caught a bit of that energy from you, some that carried your fears and your inner needs not spoken about because that need is something you fear more than other more tangible aspects the much deeper part of your soul that hides behind your eyes. not to expect this to make sense to you or perhaps you feel a little wonder at thinking what do you mean by that? i am i guess a soul reader as it is at times called, i can feel things unseen in people,what makes you tick you might imagine it to be, i am not perfect but might seem insightful from time to time, some is because of my spiritual nature, i have been told i am an empath and can at times cut through even very deep hidden parts of people,nothing of a judgemental nature. just the parts where the old pain resides. i am aware of how pain can etch into peoples lives and effect actions that might seem not to effect your perceptions when that old pain does play a part even when you do not acknowledge it. just take this with a large grain of salt. i do not mean to go where i should not go i just see things as i said,and i see in you more than you would admit to,your world view is colored by old actions by others and yourself as well. i enjoyed our chat earlier and wish you to have a good future ahead of you. ok i will stop now, i think i might be intrusive now,and i do not want to breach your comfort zone. yours in friendship Christina(my real name) but not my birth name anunitu is my goddess name that i take to honor my goddess. i hope we can again chat more