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Getting Caught!


Well, knew then I just  had to check this out further.  During the next couple of years ( 7th and 8th grades) I found myself home alone for a few hours every day after school, and while others my age were home doing school homework I was doing my own "girl work".  Always had straight A's in school, never had to study  much, but paid close attention to a lot.  You might say both school work and girl work came naturally to me. My sister was 16 years old,  I spent whatever free time I could dressing up and trying on her make up before anyone came home and loving my new-found inner peace.  Her lingerie, shoes and dresses were a perfect fit! And the makeup always felt just right, too. Oh, I still did what the other boys did too, play basketball, football, always excelled in just about everything, too. But my favorite pastime was being a girl. Even had a few girlfriends , non-sexual of course, and loved being around them.  Made me feel pretty!  There was a time when one noticed some mascara or eyeliner on me (apparently I didn't remove it all) and I just fibbed that my sister applied it once because she liked how my lashes looked.  I remember thinking I had to be more careful in the future!  And I was.        I thought...……  

Sis came home from school early one day and found some of her clothes and makeup out, and me locked in the bathroom.  Never undressed and washed so quickly, came out and pleaded for her not to tell Mom and Dad. Later that evening Dad calls me into the bedroom and asks me if I wanted to be a girl. I could talk to a shrink if I wanted to. (SHRINK?...no one's gonna shrink my brain) not on my watch at least! That was also the era of shock treatments, lobotomies, and institutions. I wasn't going anywhere!       "  Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo, Dad; that was the only time! "  was my answer.  Put that to bed real quick and didn't start feeling like a girl again until my college days. Never was depressed about it, rarely thought about it either, accepted that is the way things are. 💔

 

 

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MonicaPz

Posted

Dear Jessica and Christy,

Years ago, I babysat for a little girl and her brother.

One day, while playing, he asked if he could dress as a girl (he was about four). Allowed him, he and his sister played as if two sisters, and the next time I babysat for them, I asked if he wanted to dress as a girl again. 

Was a teenager then, and I knew nothing about transgender issues. Felt relieved he did not want to dress as a girl again, and apparently he "got it out of his system." Never told their parents. 

Have the ability to sense gender energy, as well as "future sexual orientation energy," and I sensed he would grow up heterosexual and a man.

He was just exploring, and I think children should be allowed explore. Felt as a result I was "cool" about it, that I helped him affirm that he was heterosexual and will grow up to be a man.

How would I handled it if I picked up that he was going to grow up to become a woman or a homosexual man? Probably I would have said nothing, as I was aware of my gift but did not understand it. All I could do was describe what I was "seeing," and cause upset and confusion among the parents.

By the time I was a teen, I only shared my gift in life and death circumstances, and only by describing what I saw. Tried to help others by seeking a "natural" explanation to what I was seeing.

The transgender community has helped me to understand my gift.

For that, I will always be grateful.

Your friend,

Monica

  • Like 1
Jessicatoyou

Posted

5 hours ago, Christy said:

Yep... I did the same exact thing. Except my sister was younger and I had a hard time fitting into clothes and moms were too big and risky. But I still tried everything on! 😂. I can totally relate. My dad did catch me once half dressed as a girl and I just cried and pleaded for him to go away. He stood there for a minute (which seemed like an hour) then seeing the shear terror on my face he walked away. He never said anything about it. Wheeeew. I did stop for a bit but then I just figured out how to get better at hiding it. I do look back now and wonder what life would look like if I had the courage to tell them the truth. I also believe that everything happens for a reason so...... well this is my path. 😊

 

  • Like 1
Jessicatoyou

Posted

Yes, I've always looked back, too . Got real good at hiding it too; but  am now working hard to not hiding it and looking forward for a change.❣️ 

  • Like 1
Jessicatoyou

Posted

2 hours ago, MonicaPz said:

Dear Jessica and Christy,

Years ago, I babysat for a little girl and her brother.

One day, while playing, he asked if he could dress as a girl (he was about four). Allowed him, he and his sister played as if two sisters, and the next time I babysat for them, I asked if he wanted to dress as a girl again. 

Was a teenager then, and I knew nothing about transgender issues. Felt relieved he did not want to dress as a girl again, and apparently he "got it out of his system." Never told their parents. 

Have the ability to sense gender energy, as well as "future sexual orientation energy," and I sensed he would grow up heterosexual and a man.

He was just exploring, and I think children should be allowed explore. Felt as a result I was "cool" about it, that I helped him affirm that he was heterosexual and will grow up to be a man.

How would I handled it if I picked up that he was going to grow up to become a woman or a homosexual man? Probably I would have said nothing, as I was aware of my gift but did not understand it. All I could do was describe what I was "seeing," and cause upset and confusion among the parents.

By the time I was a teen, I only shared my gift in life and death circumstances, and only by describing what I saw. Tried to help others by seeking a "natural" explanation to what I was seeing.

The transgender community has helped me to understand my gift.

For that, I will always be grateful.

Your friend,

Monica

 

Jessicatoyou

Posted

 I love it how we think about our lives and others and what we do affects and guides others.  Nice common thread!

  • Like 1
Jessicatoyou

Posted

5 hours ago, Christy said:

Yep... I did the same exact thing. Except my sister was younger and I had a hard time fitting into clothes and moms were too big and risky. But I still tried everything on! 😂. I can totally relate. My dad did catch me once half dressed as a girl and I just cried and pleaded for him to go away. He stood there for a minute (which seemed like an hour) then seeing the shear terror on my face he walked away. He never said anything about it. Wheeeew. I did stop for a bit but then I just figured out how to get better at hiding it. I do look back now and wonder what life would look like if I had the courage to tell them the truth. I also believe that everything happens for a reason so...... well this is my path. 😊

I've Always WONDERED IF, too.  But don't think that would have been the right time for me.  Just would never forget it and had a deep down feeling when the time was right it would happen.  Still wished it happened sooner in my life, but OH WELL!

  • Like 1
Mikaylajane79

Posted

I myself have always wondered what if about everything in my life. For me as long as I can remember it has been what if I was born as a girl. Then my younger sister was born. My only full sibling and I look at her and say oh that is what I would have looked like. We look a lot alike. She is so pretty. Has a lot of the same hobbies as me. Always been much of a tomboy. My mom fought me several times called me disgusting and still she says nothing to me about who I am now. But still gives me that look of disgust when I am in more of a girl mood. I kinda swing back and forth depending on who I am around. I think I will always have to be that way. 

  • Like 1
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Jessicatoyou

Posted

When I first became a member, you had a thing in "chatbox" about the convention, asking if anyone was going.  Wish I could've gone but not ready for that stuff yet, hopefully soon, though.  Anyway am dying to hear more about it..  Maybe time for another blog????❤️.  Please.... tell me (us) everything.  Am so glad you feel good about it all.

  • Like 1
Jessicatoyou

Posted

Take your time.  Would love to share your experience as if I was there!  Looking forward to it.☺️💜

  • Like 1
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