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Yes, thats what phychiatrist told me today she said, "you might be bipolar;" does mean I'm crazy??? I don't know what to think anymore. So I went to google and looked up "bipolar" so I know what I'm dealing with. No body tells this woman she's nuts ( only I can do that.) Now, I kind of understand why I have high and lows ; o good god, the lows are the worst; I tryed so many times to kill myself; but as you can tell I didnot succeed. I also, see why I've been a little to exrteme at times, or a lot to exrteme! I have to try to keep my self in check. This is easier said, than done and I well know this. Maybe this also, explains why I've had a hard time keeping friends throught my life?? They could/would not put up with the quick mood changes. I see I have a tough road to travle;thats ok I'm not afraid I'm a big girl.This will not beat me but, it could possibly define me. I know this all depends upon me and only me,for I have nobody who cares about me anymore. I'll face my challenges and look them square in the eye; I WILL SURVIVE! No matter what comes my way. Now the good part of this blog ......If I can and will do this someone else can to just don't give up, or in to the bad toughts. I'm no different than anybody else. I know that we all are unique in many ways; as well as,being the same too. If I were to tell you all that transspied and all that I lost over the past year; you all would say stop fighting just give up! many of my X friends did in fact they were waiting for me to kill myself. ( I know this because they told me so) However, that is another story for another time, and blog. This ties in this way I spent hours and hours racking my brain why did this bad thing happen ? Who did I hurt? what did I steal? I sank to the lowest level I had ever experienced I never thought a person could lose everything they worked for all their life long. you can not imagine what it feels like, and I hope you never do. this is where I was going with this; salvation I found it!! the bipolar keeps a person in the down mode when you crash and I crashed hard. this is the salvation I have found, HOPE ..........yes hope that things will get better, and they are. I stopped lying to myself and others. Than what re discovered music, yes music and I ran to it and hid in it for a while. Thats the one thing I found that great people have HOPE. So whoever you are if you read this and understand it please keep hope alive in you struggle It will get better I promise.

I clicked the "Like This" button but only because there isn't a "Love This" button. It's so great to have you here. We've come a long way actually as we've been finding our way over the years. I'm glad to hear you feel a sense of belonging here. We try to be inclusive, rather than an exclusive group that's only designed for one certain type of transgender people. All we ask is that everybody get involved and help us help each other. Lots of (((hugs))) Lori