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Sound advice, Karen, thanks. I certainly face many questions and the answers elude, especially as I'm in a fully committed relationship. She's catching up in her own understanding and acceptance (which I must have patience for) and hopefully we will meet in a place where I'm happy and she is too. I asked my gender therapist in our last meeting what actions/steps she might suggest I take to figure this out. Her metaphor is that we are on a Transgender Train with many stations along the way. We're free to get off and experience that neighborhood and get back on the train at will, to either retreat or move forward. Her advice? Continue my own research, attending her moderated support group, and unpacking my own psychological baggage with my therapist (whom she has talked to). I think we all move at our own pace. In some ways, sure, we'd like "it all to be over and done with" as soon as possible. But like they say, it's the journey not the destination. Without the journey one cannot fully appreciate the destination or know if they packed the right clothes. Emma

Emma, To quote you, "Yeah, that's good advice I think as well, Veronica. I'm holding tight to the side of the swimming pool, afraid at times of getting water up my nose. :-)" Just remember Emma,if you do decide to let go, we mammals automatically hold our breath. And at this pool, there are lot's of life guards! ;)

Karen, one thing that impressed me was that you were having ongoing dialogue with face to face friends and TGGuide members right up until going under the knife, and for that matter, as soon as you woke up, and continuing non-stop, which is the best way to live life!

Karen. I understand. Well said and good advice. I can remember the exact time and date that I died. I had a deluxe cheeseburger and a large coke to celebrate with all the other dead people I met that day! My life has been a wild ride ever since ! And I have to say you are 100% correct. Sometimes the best way to know ones self is just to let go! Veronica.

Yeah, that's good advice I think as well, Veronica. I'm holding tight to the side of the swimming pool, afraid at times of getting water up my nose. :-)