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This is basically part 2 of my previous entry about work issues. I totally agree with everyone who followed-up suggesting holding out until surgeries are done, I can't imagine starting a new job and then telling them I'm going to be out for X weeks, so better to do it now, which also lets me get more experience. The problem is that that's an "exit strategy," but it doesn't address how to cope on a daily basis with a job situation that I find basically humiliating. I don't like the idea of trying to just see it as a job, but that might be the only way. The other important piece that I came across recently involves performing - and doing something that I feel passion about. As some may know I have done some performing during a friend's drag show (earlier I would say that I was doing drag, but that isn't accurate anymore). A couple of weeks ago I did this and after I was done thought I had decided that it was time to give it up. The issue was that while I kind of enjoyed doing it, I didn't feel like I was bringing enough to it to warrant it (I don't sing, I can't dance...what else?). But then last week I was at her show - not performing just to see it - she had another guest so at one point she says "I'm going to do one more song and then bring up my guest." I had a strange feeling of excitement. I knew it wasn't me, I wasn't performing, but I still for a second reacted like I was. That's when I realized that I do still want to do it - I just have to find my angle. So yesterday I signed up for a beginner's jazz dance class :-) Passion is definitely something that I'm missing, so I'm excited to pursue this possible venue! xoxo Chrissy

I just find it so sad that there are so many people, in government, public service, free enterprise, and general citizens, the world over, that fight so hard to lay claim to more stuff and riches, as well as moral judgments, instead of honestly working to get along. The Earth is a beautiful planet and place to live and grow. Let's just be here, live together however we are, and enjoy the spinning seasons. I suppose that doesn't contribute much to this discussion. It's just the way I'm feeling this morning!

To start off I take a break every hour at work, walk down three stories, head outside for a few minutes then back to work. Although we have three elevators many uses the stairs and with that I pass several people that I don't know (we have over 1,000 employees). This one lady stopped me several weeks ago whom I have never spoken to before were the conversation was everyday stuff. This morning she stopped me again and at one point said she never said anything before to me when I was male was because I appeared unapproachable, distant and never smiled. She then said since I transitioned she noticed no male traits and that I am always the complete opposite from when I was male. In the conversation I told her about me being wrapped up in doing executive security and teach self-defense may very well have contributed to my demeanor coupled with being unhappy as a male. She told me that I was handsome as a male and pretty as a female. So I pulled out my current and former driver license. She stared at them and said "you know you look so much younger now" and I said I believe it's the hormones plus good genes. So I walked away from this I believe with a new friend who spoke frankly to me. While writing the above it reminded me of last Friday when I had a first time voice lesson. During the introduction she observed all feminine traits I had and actually pointed them all out which made me happy as I make no conscious effort to do so. I have to say my first impression after our hour was up was, she is perfect for me and there was so forward motion too. Now with that I can see where I want to be and there is indeed work ahead but she said compared to other trans clients I was doing much better than others but stressed in the beginning it will be mentally difficult working with the various aspects of "the voice".

Hiya Eve. I Am so glad that I Am Transitioning. Again, like You, I had always hated living life in the Wrong Gender. My Proper Life, My Female Life, has made Me so much Happier, and Contented. I have always Hated My " M " Part's. I have always wished that when I go to sleep at night, that I would wake up in the morning with Female Parts instead. I Know this Is The Gender Dysphoria. So I Know that I Am Definitely on the right track by Transitioning. So many people have told Me, that I have been far more approachable, since I started Transitioning, over 9 Month's ago, because I Am a Much Calmer, and Happier Person. Eve, I hope that thing's are going well for You. Have a Great Weekend. Good Health, Take Care, And My Very Best Wishes, Love Stephanie. xx

Looking unaproachable as a male has much resonance with myself, your first paragraph pretty much parallels my experience.............So glad I transitioned, it was such a relief, I hated myself, I just couldn't carry on living like that.

Hiya Chrissy. Emma has definitely made some excellent comment's there. Chrissy, get what You can out of the Perisher's, and make it work for You, Love. Look after Number One Chrissy, and that Is You. Chrissy, Have a Good Day, and a Great Weekend ahead. Remember Chrissy, We are here, for You. Good Luck, Good Health, Take Care, And My Very Best Wishes, Love Stephanie. xx

I agree with Karen. Your situation absolutely sucks but it would certainly suck more if you capitulate now (although they may not even be aware of it) and bow out before you get what you can out of them, which is your GRS and other care. At least then you can leave with your head held high. There may even also be a small chance that there will be more turnover. I found it odd that there is already been so much in such a short time. Don't count on it of course but who knows, patience and steady performance on your part may win the day on the career front as well. Another idea: where did the VP whom you liked go? Maybe somewhere that she'd like you to join her? Best wishes, Emma

Hiya Karen. It does indeed seem like You have made a New Friend at work. It also seems like You are already doing well with the voice lesson's. Karen, since I have known You here, which is well over half a year now, You have done so many positive thing's. Karen, Take a Long Hard Look at Yourself, in a Full-Length Mirror, and say to Yourself, I Am Very Proud Of Me. Because Karen, You Can Be Very Proud of Yourself. You are a Very Pretty, Beautiful, Young Lady, Who has done so well since G.R.S. You are a Very Lovely Lady, someone whom I Am Very Proud to Call A Friend, albeit through TGGuide. Karen, I hope You enjoy Your Car Club drive this Weekend. Take Care, and Mind How You Go. Karen, Speak Soon, And My Very Best Wishes, Love Stephanie. xx

Best thing to do is hang in there until after surgery if at all possible. There are (as I am sure you are aware of) many roadblocks, some very real like a brick wall while others are what you make of them.

Hiya Chrissy. I Am a former Union Shop Steward. I hate the way that Management treat People. Chrissy, this situation stinks of Gender Discrimination. It Is Totally Disgraceful. I fully feel Your hurt over the Situation. Chrissy, You are a Lovely Lady, and You do Not deserve to be treated so badly. Chrissy, Do Not let the " So-And-So's " get You down. Good Luck, Good Health, Take Care, And My Very Best Wishes, Love Stephanie. xx