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I cannot comment on the in and outs of this because my marriage ended already, but I know that even though I am not with her I am genuinely happy that my ex is happier with her new partner now and that our relationship is amicable. Being able to talk things through and trying to see things from your spouses perspective are so important in a solid relationship, I just want to let you know that I'm rooting for you both and that I truly hope that you are able to stay with the people that you love.

We do not have a spare bedroom unfortunateky. As l am going through this, part of why I was ready to leave is that when i see the look of disgust on my spouce's face when she looks at me hurts worse then seeing myself with the parts with which I was born. I have no desire to be unfaithful. I have said before, I love my wife very deeply and want to spend the rest of my life with her, i just now see that if we can stay together it will be as two women. This life transition is being so hard on both of us, I wish there were a way I could m as ke it easier on her. I understand that I am in for a struggle, I just wish that I could bear the pain myself and not share it with the woman I love.

My therapist signed off on HRT letter tonight😍🙋‍♀️❤️😲😊! I will be changing my primary care doctor to a transgender specialist tomorrow and scheduling my first appointment. Only my fourth session and would have done it sooner, but she had to complete all the assessment and paperwork required.😎

Dear Confused, Please be slow to separate. Is there a guest bedroom where you can sleep? Separation is not permission for infidelity, but for an opportunity for each partner to clear their minds. It should only be undertaken after careful discussion by both partners, and, hopefully, counseling. Please keep us posted. Yours truly, Monica P.S. Do you want for us to call you Tilly?

I was getting ready to leave tonight, she actually said the exact words I needed to hear. She said, "I don't want you to leave.". I don't know if I will be sleeping alone yet, but I guess it's something.

Wow! That is amazing news! yay!!!!

Thanks Jess, unfortunately with hospital appointments here you take what you are given and if a cancellation does come up they will give you a phone if you were next in the list. It was a pleasant phone call though so I know my name will have a good feeling associated with it. I am not in a hurry - it took me 40 years to stop and realise something was wrong, there's no need to rush now, I just have to make sure I do everything right and for the right reasons. I have plenty to be getting on with though, I have a pride event in May to look forward to going to with my niece and I want to start on hair removal asap which will involve lots of trips up and down the road, and I want to go to my supportive friends and let them meet Dee as well as telling my younger sisters and mum - so you are right - the summer will soon pass!

Hi Dee. I, too am so very happy for you. I can feel the excitement you must feel. 😊 It always helps to keep a lot of irons in the fire with future appointments. My advice, schedule them, a lot may change before October. If not you can always reschedule. When I can't get an appointment as quickly as I would like, I make sure I'm on the call list for appointments that have been cancelled, and there are probably more of those, than the ones that are kept. Learn first names and try to get to know them on a first name basis and them yours, too. Call back every few weeks and say you have an appointment but just checking if any cancellations came in that you might be able to fill. Before you know it, you'll be in.🙏 Good luck, Jess

oh i am so sorry this is hurting you sister but be strong and find your true self because that is your right and you deserve to be your true self and happy you are loved sister

After six hours to think and sleep on this decision, I still believe it is the right one. If she comes home all riled, I will take my clothes and leave...I believe it is the best thing for us both.

I think I am going to leave tomarrow...give her the space to figure things out...She told me that last night she rolled over and saw things she didn't want to see...I'm sorry if a yoga top is inappropriate sleepwear, it's comfortable. I tried to sleep topless a week or so ago, and couldn't get over feeling exposed. If she comes home fired up again tomarrow I will leave, I already am packed except for toiletries.

sorry you are going through this but i have learned the hard way you can not live to keep others comfortable but deny your own needs, they would not alter their behavior to allow you to feel real and alive so you really owe them nothing in return just from my personal experience live and for yourself and learn to love yourself because you deserve that love and caring.

Thank you Emma, 🤗 the time is obviously just right now, the massive knot I have had in my shoulder blades for the last month has all but disappeared, and the fears seem a bit more manageable. Free healthcare for all was a wonderful idea that is being ruined by greedy politicians. The NHS is notoriously understaffed and underpaid, so waiting lists are common, the benefit is that I know I will be able to tap into professionals and any medical care without having to save up for it (though I am currently intending on using the money I was spending on counselling to start hair removal) Someone once talked about a service triangle and it is very true - something can either be done cheaply, done quickly, or done well - but you can only ever get two out of three at most otherwise the time, cost or quality need to change. 💛

"I also realised that we were not really focusing in on any specific issue to do with whether or not I was trans, it was all about where I want to go and the plans I making for myself in the future." Wow, Dee, that's so huge! Very proud of you! October is a long time to wait, that's for sure. As you said it gives you time to become more familiar and sure of yourself - always a good thing. I look forward to hearing more about your journey! Emma

Dear MichelleLea, Jessica and Christy, We all should be striving to have many LAYERS of support. It felt great when a well meaning friend recently recommended a church that was not good for me. After I looked into it, and then I returned his call, I could honestly thank him for reaching out to me but was able to tell him, no thanks, I have MANY layers of support! Can't emphasize enough about doing your research and NETWORKING with others to both give and receive resources and information. Thank you all for being wonderful, supportive friends! 😊 Yours truly, Monica