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Well. I had that long anticipated and dreaded "talk" with my son today that his Dad was transgender. He's 23 years old; we're very. very close, and have gotten even closer since his mother passed away. He works in a field that typically is full of "transgender bashing jokes", and has had very little if any exposure to the reality of gender diversity. All he has heard comes from his peers who are equally clueless. So, he came over today and I told him that I had something very important to discuss with him; that it was a very difficult thing to discuss, and the mere fact that we're gonna have this conversation shows how important he is to me. (He blurts out "you have a girlfriend!!??) Long pause...……………………."No, not that simple." Something that I've known since I was about 8 years old and have been ignoring it and putting it off and off and off, hoping it would go away, but it keeps creeping up again in my psyche. In the meantime, I said, he and his mother always came first and I've always made sure that the family and the business was taken care of first. Well. I've been seeing a psychologist for a while now and do you know what gender dysphoria is? He wasn't sure, so I explained it. Right off the bat, he said so what; if it makes you happier with your life he was all for it . I said I was, but he will likely have a lot of questions down the road and I would like to teach him about it and him to learn more about it and hopefully he would eventually become my biggest advocate. He said of course he would. No problem!!!!!😍😎😲💕. He asked if that meant I would like men, I said no, I like woman, but regardless I wasn't open for any kind of intimate relationships now, and explained sexual orientation is un-related and a different thing. He asked how soon I would change, I said I didn't know for sure, I was beginning hormones next week and I'll see what happens from there. That was the gist of my coming out, I tried to keep it simple upon the excellent advice of my therapist. We will have many, many more discussions, but the likelihood of his being on board and becoming my greatest cheerleader is a good probability. By the way, he didn't have a clue before today.

Hi Jess, thank you for sharing ❤️❤️💓 - it is wonderful that you had such a great result with "the talk", your son loves you unconditionally, yay! X

Hi Emma, had to look it up, (the Benjamin Scale). I would say most of my life up to 10 years ago I "saw" myself as "IV" on the scale, and since have seen myself as a VI although in reality I've probably always been "VI" most of my life, I just never knew it before.. , but I know now😍 . Yes it is very important to be visible, one of the most important things we can do as a group, if we are able to, to help others struggling with their gender. I intend to keep my place in any community I'm in because I help build it, and have my whole life; I'm a part of it and it's a part of me. Also funny how the more you get out authentically, the easier and more natural it becomes and feels. I rarely even think of my self as transgender anymore when I'm out in public, now💇‍♀️

Attagirl Jess! I applaud your coming out authentically as yourself. I know what you mean about that word “transition”; for me, I think about it’s mean that I’m transitioning to my authentic self. But as we know that transgender is an umbrella that authenticity can be quite different from one to another. I wonder: where did you see yourself on that spectrum, say, a year ago versus now? The reason I ask is only because I was surprised to find myself continuing to inexorably move toward the right side of the Benjamin scale. I think these conferences are so wonderful. I attended my first in August of 2017 which seems like such a short time ago. Like you, I’d never gone out in public like that, presenting as authentically as I could. Those three days were scary and exhilarating. I agree that in “bubbles” like Boston and Seattle that we are accepted and somewhat applauded. I also agree how important it is for us to push ourselves to proudly just be ourselves in the communities, and demonstrate that we’re nothing to be concerned about in a negative way. We are as normal as anyone else. Through that I hope that more and more people will gain understanding and comfort.