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Dear DeeDee, May I ask, is Scotland going through snowstorms/blizzards and/or the COVID-19 pandemic at this time? Are other transgender people having the same difficulties as you, and how are they addressing it? Try to make slow but steady progress during these trying times. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Yours truly, Monica

I have been given my virtual appointment for Sandyford on 8th March. This is the formal step I need to go through to gain access/permission to start HRT, people may not know it but my understanding is that there are only 4 Gender Identity Clinics for the whole of Scotland. Sandyford in Glasgow, Chalmers in Edinburgh, then smaller clinics in Aberdeen and Inverness. Sandyford & Chalmers are the only ones that can confirm HRT and then everyone in Scotland has to have another psychological assessment through Sandyford after living as their desired gender for a year in order to be put on the list to attend a single clinic in England used by the whole of the UK if they choose to have reassignment surgery. So the whole of Scotland and then the trans population of the UK feeds through these two choke points respectively. Given that people naturally take holidays and absences you can see what I mean by them being understaffed. I may be wrong but that is the most up to date info I can find through a report published by the Scottish Public Health Network (from May 2018) Even though by now I have been speaking to a psychosexual counsellor who has confirmed my sense of gender dysphoria the appointment needs to happen for me to move forwards. I was put on this list after attending my initial GIC appointment in October 2019 when I was told that it had to be done via Sandyford. Simply put, as amazing as it is our NHS just does not have the funding it should to have the trained staff it needs... (Even without youknowhat changing the focus for everyone in healthcare) The psychology appointment is not needed to prove that I am mentally disturbed, but rather that I am sure that this is the right course of action and that I fully understand the permanent effects and possible risks of taking estrogen. As it turns out I have needed the interim time to move mentally from the position of questioning to transwoman and so as frustrating as it is I have not minded overly much. I am excited to get this appointment through and I wonder if I will still be homeschooling as that will decide if I will be able to attend as myself or not. I did respond to the request for information signing my email as DeeDee (preferred name) and today they used DeeDee when they wrote to confirm my appointment 😊 I don't know how quick it will be as a process or whether multiple appointments will be needed before I get the go ahead, and when it does if the hospital pharmacy will post my patches directly to me, or if I will have to go & be outed to a local pharmacy and talk to a local GP for repeat prescriptions but all of that will be dealt with as it happens. This is where things will finally start gaining momentum for me. Getting on HRT is what sets the timer going to socially transition, it's the old hide and seek equivalent of shouting, "Ready or not here I come!" XX

Hi Monica, Scotland has it's usual stormy winter weather, rain, ice, sleet and snow, but our coverage is rarely more than a few inches and we are used to 40-50 mph winds. The whole of Scotland is in Lockdown and all non essential shops which includes gyms and spas have been closed since March last year. There are little to no face to face appointments with anyone at the moment, so everyone is facing the same delays. The only way to get on HRT quickly is to pay privately and I am simply not in a place to go down that route. However the lack of centres and routes is not a covid issue but a government funding one. Every working age person in the UK contributes to a National insurance plan which covers free healthcare for all, but the Conservative government has been doing its best to sell it off piecemeal and privatise the service for years so they regularly underfund it and then point out the waiting times as its failure... Grr. I am excited to be starting to move forwards though

Today I was running with a local women's running group and one of the Gals I run with said I "you should enter the Olympic Trials as a woman." I believe she knows I am transgender as I usually dress unisex or gender female when I run with them. I told her that it is difficult to make the trials at any level even if I was to be able to make the women standards. (I was also thinking I would have to have a completed a sex change) The discussion was very telling as I know many of my run group see me as just another a woman running with them. Just added a photo from yesterday walking a path with my Nordic Poles.