KarenPayne

Warren, I can understand your frustrations to some extent and wish there was someway the system (thinking about say Medicare) could get you this surgery either for no charge or a greatly reduced charge. If you don't mind me asking, what state offers this for half the price?

Christie, you are indeed fortunate not to need a tracheal shave which will save you from $1500 to $2000. In regards to top surgery, something I forgot to mention which is a general recommendation is to wait for at least two years on HRT but that is not for everyone as some will grow faster yet the norm is slow growth and no larger than the largest cisgender female in your immediate family. I was a B cup and 1 1/2 years HRT prior to top surgery.

Eve, I totally agree about carrying paper hankies, in my case I carry tissues and several pantie liners.

Congratulations on moving forward!!!

From personal experience dressing androgynous before surgery before actually publicly announcing my gender change I had a discussion with my boss then HR about changing gender. HR when I asked about restrooms said there was no policy so i was free to use either or. Since dressing androgynously I used the men's room. Now mind you I was not wearing skirts or wearing makeup (and pretty much 99.99 percent of the time don't wear makeup to this day). I thus was fine using the men's room and told HR once I had my surgery a public statement would be given by me which included I would be using the woman's restroom.

Guess what I am saying is that my recommendation is use the restroom which fits how you are dressing rather than how you feel. If you do this most likely others will feel comfortable which should mean you will be more comfortable. If you do decide to use the woman's restroom I would recommend sending a company wide email out alerting others of your intentions so they are properly prepared.

Monica,

In regards to medications being prescribed locally, I guess this may be possible but things like the poop extraction formula (bowel prep) would be difficult to pack if travelling. For EKG they are required a month prior to surgery.

I had an EKG done locally, the doctor faxed the results to Marci and was confirmed by her assistant Robin. Morning of surgery they said "we can't find your EKG so we must do one now" and now is less than one hour before scheduled surgery thus not a time to argue the matter. So with that said one can be totally be prepared but the unexpected may happen as it did with me.

Concerning bottom surgery + tracheal shave + top surgery. That should provide a discount but one must also consider their tolerance for pain. I had the shave and bottom surgery done and looking back would had been fine with top surgery also considering I do extremely well with pain. During my recovery and exiting the hospital I was told many times I was in a one percentile for dealing with pain. Now if someone were to do all three they must be totally honest with themselves in how they deal with pain.

After surgery between the legs has been totally remapped and been told many need all the meds that are allowed. For top surgery it's best to be in a incline position while bottom surgery it's best to be laying down, the two contradict each other. The shave for me was zero pain so no comments there.

So again, honesty is paramount else be a big girl and big girls don't cry as the song goes.

PS By no means the above is to scare others from doing the three surgeries but to educate.

My electrologist uses a special roller then Aloe vera afterwards when I had my face done where I understood both needed to be done. In regards to hydration, I am not the best with this either but don't drink alcohol and do carry around water at work and keep a bottle in my car.

Eve, concerning blemishes after your treatment, do they perform a cool down process after finishing working on you? Diet can affect this too along with hydrating or not.

What Monica recommended is how I learned how to choose apparel for my body type and was truly eye opening. In regards to hiding private parts, that was the worst as I would tuck to completely and I mean completely hide private parts so that I could wear skin tight leggings and nothing showed. Of course the price to pay was dealing with a moist body down there attempting to get everything back in place in ninety plus degrees was in many cases a real struggle but did persevere.  I never, ever wore makeup and still don't in any weather as it's more trouble then it's worth.   

Sounds like she is an enabler who is not going to stop no matter what you say. Generally speaking you putting your foot down will do not good at this point.

Good luck with your interview tomorrow.

Eve, We hear stories that paint a different picture so I am looking to I am motivated to those who are on the edge to see that you can be happy after transitioning. Of course it's not a walk in the park but with the right mindset one can be motivated to push forward no matter what lies in their path rather than being uncontent the rest of their lives.

I pushed forward many times to be pushed backwards but was determined to finished what I started and refused to be denied happiness. This is important, there will be setbacks and must look at the end result, happiness to such a degree higher than being stuck in the wrong body not matching the brain.

Cheers 

Out here in Oregon there are incentives for people to use public transportation and many of my friends use it and can afford to drive. We do have those whom you indicated also so everyone is in a mixed barrel and yes we have those bike riders too but only can tell by what they wear and gear as biking is huge out here.

It's sad that people that bullied you have lead you to your spirit dying, nobody should have to take this and have to consider moving as an option. One thing I do know is if they see it hurts you they will continue which is even worst that they must continue with their crap.

Monica, thanks for your insight. In regards to law enforcement, I have been working with law enforcement for a long time, have done executive protection and have and still teach empty hand techniques that apply to various types of attacks. You are correct about not calling a bullet back which is why I also had other weapons, firearms were only one of them. I did this from 2001 until 2013 for company security and executive protection. I could easily write a blog entry on this stuff but refrain from it as it would be very disturbing to many here as it entails shooting and such. I have been trained by elite entities over the years where many are only open to military and law enforcement.

If there is a decent size group that commits to one of my classes anyplace in the United States I will come to them for one or two days.  

Remember when dating that many tend to leave their guard down which is unwise. Meeting for drinks, never accept a glass of something that you did not see being opened or go to the restroom leaving your drink there on the table. There are people who might lace your drink with some form of date rape drug.  Tell a friend your plans and when you are expected home with a check in. If possible, and when appropriate take a picture of their car's tags and email to a friend so that if something bad happens this can be given to police.

Never invite them back to your place until you are comfortable which for me might be three or four dates and then ahead of time will make sure valuables are hidden.

In regards to transgender, as Monica indicated to disclose this until they have acknowledge this fact. I have needed to do this a handful of times, not with online dating but when out with friends where it happens somewhat like they come over to your table and interjecting into your conversation, ask to buy you a drink etc. Be careful how you tell them you are trans as it can offend their manhood especially if they are intoxicated.

Veronica, I will be gliding down the bottom of Wyoming so there is a good possibility of me making it your way, that is if you and Violet will be around when I hit the area. Will let you know ahead of time. It would be great to meet both of you.

Nutty drivers, heck can't be any worst than California or Oregon 

Monica, I am going to spend time with him in the near future as nothing should be left to chance. 

Yes indeed we can all improve upon ourselves as the majority missed out in the early years of being brought up female.

Monica, I will be on the East Coast around April but not sure about getting to New York, will have to wait and see as the last trips took me through to Ohio then PA.

Eve, for the record I very much enjoy long drives. My first great drive was 1500 miles when I was 18 from the east coast to the center of the country. I will admit that on the 3500 mile trip each time when returning home the last 200 or 300 miles bothered me as that leg of the journey is known for police watching for people speeding. Never have been ticketed so knock on wood.

Good to hear about your trip

Warren, in regards to meds, I know full well that meds that are prescribed don't always work and would tend to agree with you that not taking them is wise if they make you feel worst.

It's sad there is nobody you can turn too in regards to "they'd rather I disappear". Here in Oregon that would not be an issue as Portland Oregon would be heaven for you with support and I am fairly sure you could get employment which may not be the best but you would be in a much better place. 

I think it's healthy to look back and one's self through images to see the changes and how far you have come in a transition. I never did but a good friend of mine took pictures over the years from 2007 till the present and now happy she did so. 

One of the small but important changes I see in your pictures is no smile as a male to smiling as a female. I can't imagine anything but a bright future for you.

Mikah, I can always use improvement.

If I may suggest, take pictures of your face every month. In about 12 months look back at the first and the last, you should see changes that are not seen over the duration of the 12 months. This happened with me, could not believe the difference.