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As a cisgender Lesbian, the price for immediate interaction, as provided by the Internet, rather than meeting face to face, is a loss of community. It is important to maintain community. In the age of the Internet (especially social media), cell/smart phones, and other technology, it is becoming more and more difficult. In the Lesbian community, as I am seeing Lesbians approaching gaining their full civil rights, I am seeing less community. Presently, I only see Lesbian Connection and Golden Threads, among a few others, trying to maintain community among Lesbians, and they are struggling. Sadly, I have also noticed that most Lesbian bookstores no longer exist. My great concern is, when, as transpeople achieve greater acceptance, are they going to lose community, too? The challenge to the TLGB community, is to maintain community as the emphasis in our society shifts from face to face to online interaction. In my opinion, I feel we have it reversed. People should meet face to face PRIMARILY, and maintain contact (and community!) through technology. The Internet should be seen as a tool to support face to face interaction, but not to supplant it.

Just some random thoughts as another week comes to an end and I get ready for a 4-day weekend (YAY!) I mentioned in an earlier post that this week I finally wore shoes (2 days) that are clearly women's. This was also the first week that I've gone 100% in female clothing. I'm still getting more "sirs" than I'd like, and someone yesterday commented on what I was wearing saying "I respect a man who can wear pink." Those things all make me wonder "what more do I have to do!?!?" Well, that's my weekend project, figuring out what more I can do I had my first electrolysis appointment yesterday. It was 45 minutes (10-15 minutes of consultation first, then 45 minutes of actual electrolysis). It hurt, but it wasn't as bad as i had feared, and she started with the upper lip which she said was the most painful part. Going into it my fears were (1) if I could afford it (I will find a way!), (2) if it would hurt too much (I have 4 tattoos, this didn't feel as bad), and (3) that I had to let the hair grow a couple of days before the session - AHH!!! (it's worth it for the long-term benefit). What I noticed though was that there was no fear about whether or not I really wanted it. It did scare me at the end when she said I can't wear make-up for the next week - I'm supposed to do drag on Tuesday, that might be a challenge (I'll see what I can pull off this weekend, something without foundation) Also reached out to my doctor about getting a propecia prescription and to have at least a preliminary discussion about hormone therapy. Haven't been able to make contact with him yet, but I should get somewhere on this early next week. My new therapist continues to be wonderful! And she gave me contact information for TG support group in the city. They meet the 1st Wednesday of each month, so I have that in my calendar for June. At work there was also a very positive development. The person who used to be my bosses' boss (she was over all 3 people to whom I report) shifted positions, she's now the head of the Office of Diversity and Inclusion (or something like that). When the announcement came out about that I sent her a congrats email, and used that to "come out" to her (I think she might have known already, but I wasn't sure). She thanked me and said that she definitely wants to incorporate trans issues into the work that she'll be doing (it is a new position), and she said that she'd like to chat with me sometime soon to get any thoughts I might have about what the school can do. I've known her for several years and I know that she's not the type to just "blow smoke up your ass," if she says she wants to do something she really does, and typically gets it done. So on my task list for the long weekend is also to think about what I see as the logistical things that might come up, and then look at that to see what I should raise with her. I'm also meeting with our HR director again to update - she mentioned that they are very soon going to "re-label" rest rooms with respect to gender identity (she couldn't tell me more about that yet). Finally, on Wednesday night I do a volunteer gig at a comedy theater in the city. I told the person who coordinates volunteers that I had decided to start using my female name, so this week that started. He's really sweet, he seemed to go out of his way to find ways to use my name whenever he could, and before I left we had a long conversation about it, he was curious about a lot of it (and also apologized in advance if he asked anything insensitive, which he didn't do). There were also 2 occasions that night where I had to introduce myself to someone and that was the first time I introduced myself in person to someone as Christie So on the whole this was a really good week! Underneath all of this was just a far greater comfort with what I'm doing and where I'm going. I hope everyone has a lovely Memorial Day weekend! xoxo Christie

I was just reading Christie's recent blog post which brings me to the following (it was a jog to my short term memory). My girl friend was watching the season finally of Survivor while I was napping on my recliner. I woke up, she looks at me and says "even with you sitting there with no makeup (she is use to me with mascara as I don't wear makeup) and in pajamas I can't begin to imagine you as a dude and I have known you since 2007." I turn to her, give her a thumbs up and smile. She says No, there is no way you were ever a dude even when I dated you. She had told me about a year ago that one night when we were sleeping together that she had to go sleep on the couch because sleeping with me was felt like she was sleeping with a female and she is not a lesbian or bi-sexual. She only told me this as a Revelation after learning I was trans. On another note (really to small for another blog entry) I have been receiving text messages from a female whom I have known for 20 years the past two days and can see that she is indeed into me which is great because I was hoping we could hook up. I am a proud lesbian but also seem recently been curious only about sex with a male, no relationship with men, only interested in a relationship with females. Okay off to dilate

Hi Monica, You're certainly correct, face to face is Always Better and I think many people hide behind their screens. In business I often hear people say "Well, I sent them an email..." to which I respond "Why not pick up the phone and Call them?" It's too easy to pick an excuse and accept a distorted reality that it's okay to drop the ball. That said, though, I think an issue with the trans community is that most really do want to simply blend in, to be identified as their true gender and not stand out or be confused with their birth gender. I can't blame them at all. Some trans folks are comfortable identifying as trans and many (most?) are not. I imagine that's the way it will be until our society not only accepts but also embraces trans as viable and valuable members of society. But, I know what you mean, and it's good to express the desire that we stand up for ourselves and remain a community. Thank goodness for TG Guide, which provides me with even this little way that I too can stand up alongside those who are much braver and steadfast than me. Emma

Had problems sleeping last night but got around three hours then awake for one then slept for about four hours. The pain during those hours was fairly intense until my friend woke up and gave me my meds. After the medication was taken I almost feel like I am back to myself unlike yesterday after medication was taken I was still in pain. Right now the pain is almost non-existing. It's just before 5 AM which means five hours to go for my post-operation checkup. I can easily see myself back to work next Tuesday if recovery stays on the path it has been so far. My recommendation for post surgery is to sleep in bed with your upper body elevated about 30 degrees or as I did, been living in a recliner which I did for operations in the past, works great.

At my post surgery appointment I was told all looked fine. There will be at least four more visits/check-ups. They were very surprised when my female friend reported that I had taken only twenty-five percent of the pain killers since surgery and said most patients take all the medication. They gave me Lipikar Baue AP creme which helps restore skin's hydrolipidic layer for my breast. My current pain level is under 1 using 1 to 10 scale

Dear Karen, May I suggest Vitamin E softgels to speed healing and, with your doctor's permission, after your stitches have been removed, putting Vitamin E liquid (by piercing a Vitamin E softgel) onto the scar, to prevent scarring. Women tolerate pain much better than men, in my opinion, due to estrogen, and also women are designed to tolerate pain better in order to give birth. Tolerated pain very well in all my surgeries and used very little prescription medicine, EXCEPT for my radical hysterectomy, (removed all my female organs along with the top third of my vagina), as well as biopsies of all my internal organs in my abdomen, to ensure no spread of the cancer. Had to use medical marijuana for two weeks after the hysterectomy, as NOTHING covered my pain, although when I was in the hospital, the nurses commented they saw nobody use the morphine pump less than I did. Wish the morphine pump came home with me or that I stayed longer in the hospital. Because I was a Medicare/Medicaid patient, I was in the hospital two nights and three days. Continue getting well, my friend. Yours truly, Monica

Dear Karen, When I had surgery on my left breast at the 9 O'Clock position, to remove a benign growth deep inside the breast, I wore a compression bra post surgery. Had Percocet, which did cover the pain. Of course, a biopsy is very different than a breast augmentation or mastectomy. My thoughts and prayers are with you for your continued recovery. Your friend, Monica

In regards to not wearing makeup for a week, that's hard to believe. I would think that three days afterwards you should be able to wear makeup as I have done so in the past.

Monica, I agree sooo much with that! I was very happy to finally find a TG support group in the city, I'll be going to that in a couple of weeks (they meet the 1st Wednesday of each month). TG Guide has been wonderful and indispensable, but I know that being face-to-face with other trans people will be so very nice. And I do think that communities based on technology sometimes get overrated. Especially when it's based on "liking" facebook posts, and "re-tweeting." Those are easy. At least with TG Guide we have more extensive and meaningful discussions xoxo Christie

Yep... I googled "Electra Woman," too. I also looked at the 1976 calendar to see why I couldn't really say I remembered the show. Seems it's regular timeslot was on Saturday mornings. Perhaps about the time the show came on, my brother and I might have been doing chores, or there were cartoons on that we preferred to watch.

My friend had me pick up groceries prior to surgery, two items in particular I wondered about, strawberries and blueberries. Well last night I found out they were for me to assist with constipation as happens after surgery. So I am eating them right up. Urinating is no problem at all. Speaking of urinating, I am wearing a rather loose fitting and long top so each time I go the top is lifted up over my new breast and of course have to stare at them, oh so nice looking if I do say so myself. Dinner was fantastic, my friend made a disk that I can not explain other than I eat everything off my plate. I am having troubles sleeping, went to sleep in my recliner as the chair provides a better position that my bed. The longest I have slept for is two hours. It's 1 AM right now and fully awake. Pain, it's currently at 2 out of 1 to 10 scale were most of the pain is from a strap that runs around my chest and covers the top of my breast to keep them down and in. I will see if my friend will take a picture so you all can see for yourself.

Just had a call from the surgeon's office asking me how I was doing. One of her comments was "does it feel like an elephant is sitting on your chest?" I said, never thought of it like that but yes we can go with that. Have an appointment with them a 10:30 tomorrow morning. I have been taking mini-naps but nothing more than 60 minutes. If I didn't say it before I will say it now, all the pain is worth it

Oh my, I'll admit I didn't remember about Electra Woman, but when I googled it I did recall the show. Not a bad choice

So glad that your recovery seems to be going so well! I hadn't thought about the implications for sleeping before. I can imagine it's an adjustment even after the recovery from surgery is done. I sleep on my side and there would suddenly be a new weight pulling down. Still, I can't wait

Thanks Veronica, will watch the video later (it's 1 AM and my friend is asleep). ROTFFL on the nuke keys.

Congratulations, Karen, and best wishes for a speedy recovery!

Oh my, does it date me too much to admit that when I was very young, I really wanted to be Electra Woman? (Yeah, you younger ones will have to Google that... )