Blogs

HER STORY

Good evening, again haha I just wanted to bring up a fabulous show I've found on youtube called 'Her Story' about a transgender woman and a lesbian ciswoman, the fights, struggles and transphobia that dear Violet endures; like most transwomen do. Please take a moment to watch but please be aware of trigger warnings. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UkHicPm7C6Q Alex

March 5, 2016

The truth about You

TRIGGER WARNING: This post contains mention of--Self harm, abuse, self image, depression, and other possible triggering topics. You. This is something that has crossed my mind in recent events, and I shamelessly must let it out else my mind may explode. You. Male. Female. Transfemale. Transmale. Non-binary. Androgynous. Gender Fluid. Fae, they, him, her, we, zei, zem..... Pronouns and identities. More than I could ever count without assistance, but all are just as important as the next. I cou

March 5, 2016

Family Feuds growing Cold

Good Evening Ladies, Gents, Faes, and every other possible person who may be reading this regardless of identity or pronoun. That particular sentence is something that I can be proud of...I do have a confession to make, but perhaps the topic of my blog first? Yes, I do think that this would be the best tactic to use first and foremost. I do warn you, however, that this post is very long. Thursday. That day, in a childhood long past yesterday, was a day in which I would usually spend from sun up

March 5, 2016

Waiting on bad news.

Took Nikki's favorite cat to the vet, her purr has gone weird and she lost a lotta weight, we thought she had a respiratory infection or something. Unfortunately, it's looking like something and not an infection. They are sending her xrays and labs out, but the prevailing thought right now is that our kitty girl has lung cancer. So not happy right now, and desperately hoping for a hail mary your local vet was wrong, it's nothing. I know she's 14, but I'm just not ready.

March 4, 2016

Karen's thoughts

Metamorphosis

Been on hormones for close to two years now and beginning to notice a difference in my brain from normal patterns of feeling unlike before and not certain how to put the changes into words even though I recognize not a subtle change but like dropping off a cliff. This involves general thought processes and emotions yet the emotional aspect has been changing small amounts over the entire time I have been on hormones. So far there is nothing negative in regards to the changes in my brain, only pos

KarenPayne

March 3, 2016

Karen's thoughts

Karen's method of tucking (it's really good)

My version of tucking requires two items, patience’s, some pain (maybe) and persistence in the beginning. Item one is called a gaff from “The Breast form store” in the smallest size possible. My waist, 32 inch which falls in to the medium size so I went to a small size gaff. Item two, Spanx compression boy shorts (same sizing idea as the gaff) where there are two types, non-compression and compression version. Procedure, pull up the gaff to just above the knees, pull up the boy shorts over the

KarenPayne

March 2, 2016

The upsides of being married to Nikki.

So now that I'm adjusting, there are some real upsides to being married to Nikki (specifically for me, or someone genderfluid in general). I was talking to my freind Kate about all this and explaining why it was unrealistic for me right not to be able to attend her wedding in June adn she should give my spot to someone able to go (her guest list is really tight, and better she able to invite someone who could potentially enjoy it) and I thought I would put these things down here. This is about

March 1, 2016

Kitten Scratches

Cancer, make-up, old memories and learning to deal

Found out a really decent human being I used to see at work every day until the middle of last year when he started cancer treatments passed away yesterday morning. He always had a smile on his face and always had a kind word and he really didn't deserve it. Hell no one does. I guess I kind of knew this was coming. No one had good news and he had to change where he was getting his treatment because he couldn't handle the drive anymore, but this isn't something anyone should ever get used to. On

KittenNikki

March 1, 2016

Sunday musings.

Feeling better, still coughing a big but not like yesterday and there is no gurgling down my windpipe as I breat now. So spent the day with Nikki watching the rest of this anime I stumbled into called K. It's one of those that makes absolutely no sense the first couple episodes, it just throws you into the middle of a conflict, but I liked the characters and wanted to know what was happening to them, and by the end of the anime it had all unraveled into this beautiful and sort of sadly painful

February 29, 2016

Karen's thoughts

Life after gender reassignment surgery you may not have thought about

A few things that come to mind with humor. You can (or should not) go into a bar without a companion Females include you in their secret chit-chats (that's why I transitioned, just for that) Make sure to read the restroom sign (ooooops I made that mistake already, got some looks) Female products have a "Woman Tax" Pany liners uug You start noticing things like oh, my legs look crappy, exfoliating time Stay way from Victoria's Secret's, you can pass by one and not buy a new bra, panties, lotions

KarenPayne

February 28, 2016

Finding Myself

Semi-Perminate "See ya"

So, for various reasons, I've decided to take a semi-perminate break from blogging. I just have nothing positive going on in my life right now and I dont want every single blog post I put up to be negativity and venting. I'm just.....tired. Nothing I say is right anymore, and somehow I always seem to anger someone. Last night I was basically yelled at for my blog post being insensitive and rude and it severely made someone mad at me, and later it was brought to my attention that I swear way too

WarrenG

February 27, 2016

Can I just please have some air?

All the symptoms but the lung congestion have fallen away. If it's not gone by Tuesday, I'm going to back to see Bethany because I've had things like this turn into Pnuemonia before. And the last thing Nikki needs just before he starts seeing the therapist is for me to go from sick to 'into real trouble'. Blargh. I feel like I want to cough out my lungs, windpide, and or esophagus. And I have this irrational fear that I"m ruining the weekends girl time, even though Nikki says he's not feel

February 27, 2016

Deadpool, markers and Misgendering

Good Evening, everyone. I do hope that everyone has had a pleasant day or evening. So far, mine has been rather uneventful and dull, aside from the taunting scent of fresh baked brownies coming from the kitchen. I've been informed that I'm not allowed, sadly. Warren has had us on this new kick of exercise and trying to eat better. I dare say, his sandwich he'd made with turkey, salami, cheese, spinach and red pepper hummus nearly forced me to vomit mid-bite. I do not think I'll be doing that aga

February 27, 2016

Blair Jamie

Students of 2016

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BEoGy0ZpciA This is my latest video upload, i talk about what its like being a student in 2016 and what that means for the LGTBI community. I am utterly grateful to be in a more accepting society where i can be a teenager and transition during high school with support and love. Watch the full video here- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BEoGy0ZpciA Let me know what you think and PLEASE SUBSCRIBE, it means the world to me.

Blair

February 26, 2016

Words Matter, and Bree finally figures out her changing sexuality.

I was talking with Nikki about something today, and he called this his problem. I didn't like that. This isn't our problem, this is our lifestyle. The dog constantly dumpster and litter box diving, cats peeing anywhere they please, those are problems. Nikki enjoying dressing en femme and needing his body hair as gone as we can make it? Lifestyle. Because language does dictate thought. Ideas form from words, and the choice of words colors the thought. And the only problem my husband has i

February 25, 2016

Kitten Scratches

Hell Plague

So after taking care of Bree for almost a week, I've contracted the milder form of the Hell Plague. So when I'm feeling better I'll be back on here more. Right now there's a lot of moping and moaning and drinking of juice.

KittenNikki

February 24, 2016

On Being...Me

Surgery

Last Thursday I went to Albany, NY for a surgery consultation (Surgeon who does breast augmentation + surgeon who works with transgender patients + takes my insurance = go to Albany). The surgery won't happen until August, I have to be on HRT for a full year before insurance will cover it (they'll cover it if I'm "not comfortable with the growth that occurs after a year on HRT"), so it's tentatively scheduled for August 12. I got the basics down - it's an outpatient procedure that will take abo

Chrissy

February 24, 2016

Still alive

So Nikki and I had our follow up appt. yesterday for the blood pressure medication, and she glanced over us for the plague while we were there, and broke my turtle heart. This is a two week plague. *headdesK* I'm past my first week and at least feeling better, but another week of congestion and coughing is not making me happy. I imagine Nikki is less happy only being a few days into it. And he's tolerating the blood pressure medication better than me, so mine has been changed. Maybe I can

February 24, 2016

Emma Sweet's Blog

Spontaneous Smiling Alert

Last Thursday as I was planning my day I knew that that evening I had an appointment with my therapist. I made plans to drop by an Amazon locker to pick up a new top and told some people that I was nervously thinking of putting it on in his restroom and surprising him in our meeting. At lunch I read some encouragement from Veronica, Bree, and I think others, which just felt wonderful. After, as I walked to get a cup of coffee I suddenly realized I was smiling. I felt so wonderful to contemplate

Emma

February 21, 2016

Surrendered to the Nyquil

I have a weird thing with cold meds. I couldn't take any of them without risking a painful death when I was on my long term asthma medication, so I sort of developed a fear of them in general. My brain makes important things habitiual so I don't forget when I'm half sleep or not paying attention. So Nikki has to fight stupidly hard to get me to take them. And of course, they are huge, my throat hurts, and damn near just choked myself. At least things with Nikki are going great. We've settl

February 20, 2016

Morning moment of confusion.

Nikki made a comment while I was plague moaning(I'm really whiny when I'm sick, I confess), that he'd been planning to spend all day until the gaming event tonight in girl mode, but me being sick required boy mode and I'd ruined his plans (In a joking manner, I don't think there was any resentment). My response, after he figured out the words because my voice is cracked up, was "Does girl mode preclude me getting fed and taken care of?" HIm: No... Me: Then what do I care? Just gimme something

February 19, 2016

Nikki did it

He took our conversation seriously and rallied round when the guild teasing turned to me. I'm so sick I just wanna hide and he was all nope we're leaving Bree alone tonight she'll play with you guys next week. It was a great practice start. Love my Nikki. Wanna collPse quietly in a corner. Germs you win. I surrender.