Blogs

Nikki's First Day Out

After talking with Bree we decided to talk on the way up for lunch and keep to our original Friday plans and hit up the calzone place we like. I have to admit I was more distracted getting ready this time than I have been before. It wasn't just the argument we'd gotten into but I have to admit that was a big part of it at the start. I was more thinking about the fact that Bree and I were going out on a date and I was going to be in girl mode, granted in casual girl mode in jeans and a nice shirt

March 12, 2016

And I screwed up

Bree got me thinking after we talked and got into an argument because I'm over-reacting and not understanding like normal and maybe I am being a guy about all of this in how I relate to her. It's not easy on her, my either misunderstanding or complete lack thereof making her incredibly upset and now that we've talked more she made me realize I'm either coming across as being incredibly selfish or am incredibly selfish. I am being selfish on a lot of things in this. Yes there are some things that

March 11, 2016

Where Nikki's gender questioning messes me up a bit.

So... obviously right now gender is a spotlight conversation and understanding topic in our household while we're figuring out how to meet everyone's needs. And now that I have time to think, I'm realizing he's confusing things in my head. This is not a complaint or criticizing post, this is just me working out my thoughts way early in the morning. I'm not usually up yet, and it's hard to articulate these feelings, so forgive me as I'm about to fail badly to express the mess in my head. Nikki

March 10, 2016

Finding Myself

Back from my Drama-fest, more to come.

Hello again, my Lords, Ladies and Majesties. Up front I want to apologize for my outburst and dramatic exit. Stress has been neck deep over here and I unfortunately dove head first into the fritz so bad that Ms. Frizzle would surely kick my not-so-royal behind. I took a break and tried to collect myself again, but I cant promise that I'm back up to par. I still have a LOT going on over here but I'll do my best. Please forgive me if I mess up on my swearing and stuff again, but yes, I did read th

WarrenG

March 10, 2016

Brigsby's Blog

Up To Hour 46 Post Op

Day one Post Op: Pain and Mobility Expectation - To be too sore to live and need help with absolutely everything. Reality - I have taken my pain meds every 4 hours, and I am not in much pain, just a little sore. It's more of a discomfort.I am able to lift cups of water and pillows. I can't lift my arms higher than my chest muscles, but turn on lights using my head. I couldn't twist bottle caps off yesterday but I can tonight. Comfort (sitting, lying) Expectation - I wasn't sure, but was expecti

Brigsby

March 10, 2016

First Therapy session, lunch and a haircut

I was actually feeling kind of down today as our resident conspiracy theorist and cynicist extreme (I thought I was bad and he takes it to a whole new level) managed to be even crazier and down on everything than usual. The dude needs to go back to therapy or something because he's getting to levels where he could drive a room of people out just from his scowl. Anyway, did what I could to brighten my own mood a bit and talked to Bree as much as I could at work. Had to leave early today (thankful

March 9, 2016

Wednesday musings.

Went to the therapy place with Nikki, and I stayed in the lobby, but man it was relaxing. They had this really zen music playing, and it was nice, and there was this pretty mood lamp next to me, and I was just mellowing out have a nice conversation with a lady until her appointment, then sitting working on a puzzle. I really should have asked what cd they were playing, that was some really nice laid back music. The couch was comfy. And there was water and a coffee bar if I got thirsty. Then

March 9, 2016

Brigsby's Blog

Top Surgery Update

I had surgery today and everything went better than expected. I wanted the anchor-t or inverted-t method so I have an extra scar, but I'm alright with that. That's a whole other can of worms. i do find if I am trying to stay awake for a prolonged period of time, I get nauseous. Also if you have surgery in the future- stay away from oranges and orange juice, you will regret it! My family still have no idea I went under the knife today. I haven't spoken to either of them in a while. I'm tired. I

Brigsby

March 9, 2016

My face is covered in makeup.

IT hasn't been like this...since um...the first year I was married maybe? I stopped fighting with my skin and just didn't really care. Nikki didn't care. But now it's a thing again, because I noticed that people see what they expect to see, and two girls going out for a calzone (OMG I LOVE CALZONES! and they are SO hard to find in my area for some reason) blend better if they are dressed and made up similarly. Like i reinforce the image of him. I know when I went out with actual girls peop

March 8, 2016

Make-up and my own shoes and haircuts, oh boy

So the plan is to get a haircut that matches with my avatar here a bit more. Lots of layers but more shoulder length so it's more where I like it. I always dread getting my haircut because I'm always worrying they'll cut it way too short. I like it long-ish. Bree and I went out for make-up last week, just the basics. I'm currently in girl mode and feeling a bit giddy about it all. I went through and followed a really good YouTube video for make-up covering the beard and all that jazz and did a

March 8, 2016

Youtube is eating my soul.

Seriously, I lost gobs of time to Youtube. It always starts out innocently. I want to hear a certain song. Watch some tutorial videos so I know what Nikki wants me to buy. In the mood for a laugh so look up news blooper videos (OMG nothing is funnier than news going wrong!). The try guys people I like watching trying new things for the first time. And then...it's there. The bane of my existence. That bar on the right with other videos linked, ones that tempt me into clicking, and the next

March 8, 2016

Mixed signals.

I don't feel shiny today, just kinda stressed and confused but trying hard to work it all out. So...after trying to sort out some mixed signals from Nikki, I decided it was time to be Bree and came up with a plan. Nikki talks about going out A LOT more than he realizes. But when I asked him about it, he's like one to two years down the road. Okay. But then he talks about it again with all the signals of I want to be doing this. Nikki and Bree have a dynamic here, and that is Nikki is afrai

March 8, 2016

It's getting a little warmer!

Super excited about the weather, and had a long talk with the girl who runs our summer retreat of friends, and she is fiercely pro-Nikki and told me (unsolicited, I was just answering her questions why I'd gone weird the last six months and then so busy I couldn't talk to anyone because I was in deep talks with Nikki about everything) "I'm completely comfortable with him bringing his femme clothes and anyone who isn't comfortable here can go the fuck home because this is our safe space". I love

March 7, 2016

Michele800226's Blog

Months Away, with new challenges

Hi all, haven't been around for a while and yes. I still hope that everyone is doing well. One of the most recent things that happened was a dreadful birthday, where I was feeling depressed and violated to the extend that I stayed indoors as I got home the day before and didn't leave my bed except for bathroom breaks and eating obviously, (from the Thursday evening till the Monday around noon. Didn't even answer any calls, just played games on my tablet and basically slept the whole time.

Michele800226

March 7, 2016

Karen's thoughts

Getting together...

I am also a member of another cross-dresser/transgender site which is predominantly cross-dressers with a section for transgender. I frequent that site say once a week, sometimes every two weeks. I posted in the transgender area about my voice lessons and then the same day received a request to meet a member. Since I was heading in her direction to prom dress shopping with my best friend and her daughter I should sure. So this afternoon we were suppose to meet in front of Pandora's in the mall a

KarenPayne

March 7, 2016

Karen's thoughts

Socializing

I have meet our moderator here (the week after GRS where she took me out for a great dinner in California), only member that I have meet in person but had the pleasure to chat with several members here in the past where one member setup a conference call each Saturday. Although the conference calls did not last long I think they were an excellent idea as vocalizing verses writing is vastly different. I am hoping to meet two members here in person (and would like to meet more), one in the US and

KarenPayne

March 6, 2016

Chantel

Breaking walls

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Chantel

March 6, 2016

Tired of winter.

I'm tired of being cold. I miss my pool. I miss being able to just walk out the door and not worry about balancing what feels like a hundred pounds of clothing with my lungs cold-air reactions and Nikki freaking out that I"ll have an asthma attack. I miss playing D&D outside in the backyard in our lovely screen tent (cuz wow the bugs in this area), sitting at night with Nikki at the backyard fire pit watching the flames and talking quietly about the life, the universe, and everything in t