Significant Others

Realize that Ellen already wrote a book review on the book, The Sky Turned Green & The Grass Turned Blue: Diane's Story by Diana Kelly, about her personal journey as the Significant Other to a M2F Transsexual. Feel very strongly that not only significant others, but also transgender people themselves and therapists should read this book. The most important lesson I took away from this book was that serious personality disorders can afflict transgender people, as they can anyone else. Don't want to revisit the old days when horror/crime movies/books would feature a bad guy dressing up as a woman as part of their fetish. That is not what I am talking abou…

Ok, my in laws have never liked me. That much has been clear through my entire marriage. Mainly it's because I don't come from money. Also I'm disabled. I'm in a wheelchair and will be for the rest of my life. For simplicity I'll call her MIL and him FIL. MIL and FIL are stuck up, entitled jerks. I want to use more explicit terms, but obviously, I can't here at TGG. Especially my mother-in-law. MIL has made comments throughout our relationship, both before the wedding and after. But after is when it got worse. A few years ago the 4 of us were out at Olive Garden. I made a joke with my wife and that was when MIL started threatening me with physical violence. Yet when I sai…

Hi. I'm a bisexual gf to a MtF trans. Our relationship is really new, 2 months, but I really like him/her and hope this becomes a long term relationship. I'm here looking for sport, guidance, advice since I've never been with a transgender person before. Right now, in the town we live in, he is male 100% of the time when in public. In the privacy of his home, he relaxes and let's her true self shine. I'm attracted to him and her. However, I'm having trouble consolidating the two sides. I see him as him and her. Not as one person, but as 2 individuals. I'm afraid to refer to him as her on a regular basis when we're alone because I don't want to get used to it and slip whil…

I'm a mostly-closeted lesbian (not out to family or totally out within my community) married (second marriage) married to a wonderful, loving MTF who still mostly presents publicly as male (but not all the time). I'm not really ready to introduce myself in the general forums yet, but wanted to say hello here as a spouse. I will continue to read the forums and hope to contribute to the conversations!

In this post I am really interested in knowing what questions ran through a spouse's mind or that they asked out loud within the first month or two after their spouse came out to them and informed them of their being transgender or transsexual. Rest assure that I can pretty much guarantee you that if you had/have a question them someone else has had it before you and someone else in the future will also have it after you. From the questions that spouses/significant others of transsexuals or a transgender person post as comments to this entry, I will research to find as much information relative to and really do hope I can find the answers to them for you as well as for …

I thought it might be helpful to post some of the types of questions that female partners of TS individuals (M>F or F>M) going through transition may have. I hope it might add to awareness - 1. "Since coming out as TS M>F my husband spends a lot of time on line looking at half-naked photos. He>She did not do this before. What does this mean?" 2. "Have you noticed increased aggressive behavior from your TS spouse since starting hormonal therapy?" 3. "He says he loves me and wants to be with me for the rest of our lives but he has asked me if we can have an open relationship. I want to be with him, but I do not want to have an open relationship and …

If you found a support group in your area please share so many Significant Others Dont know were to turn and if you found support in an area others may live close to they might bennefit from your leed . Was it a local LBGT center , a group , a church that is LBGT friendly and supportive , did you start a support network for those in the area .

I feel vindicated, because I searched everywhere on the internet looking for a support and/or social cd and spouse freindly (or even just cd friendly by the end of my searching for just him if there was nothing else to be had) within a reasonable distance of us. I looked over every rock, nook and cranny. So when Nikki went to therapy, it came out why I failed, there are none. Doh. HIs therapist said his timing in asking her was interesting because she had been considering starting one because there are not any, and were we interested. Yes we're freakin' interested start the group woman! *I get slightly rabid when I'm frustrated and failed at something* We can't be …

SO after finally sorting through everything with Nikki, I"M BACK with another one. Today my son came out. Square one, nice to see you, it's been a while. At least this time I'm armed with information and can process this more coherently.

Generaly a wife club for there opinions I am seriously in need of some type of support group for my partner to help her understand more about as to what G.I.D realy is and what it means,

I just found this article on Huffington Post and liked it a lot: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/georgia-kolias/the-secret-to-staying-together_b_6379276.html?utm_hp_ref=transgender Here's the closing paragraph which has, at least for me, some real wisdom: "The secret to staying together is staying together, but more than that it is caring enough to see the world through someone else's eyes and saying, I see you. Not just the bluster or hubris, but the soft core inside that is oftentimes hidden from the harshness of the world. I see you." Isn't that nice? I need to remember that. Perhaps we all do. We all have a soft core inside that is at times vulnerable and sca…

In this post I would like to start of by having anyone that is transsexual or cissexual and who is willing to participate in my research with the topic of "The Process of Transitioning for Significant Others of Transsexuals" please (1) give me the basic (without names or using fictitious names) description of the type of relationship you are/were involved in, (2) the gender of each partner (trans-partner has pre transition and post transition/gender identified as listed), (3) sexual orientation of both partners (pre and post transition listed if different), (4) years together (pre marriage/civil union and years married/civil" union), (5) whether or not you and your part…

We got married in 2008. That’s 12 years ago. She got her stimulus check today. It came under her maiden name. I asked her about it and her excuse was “I guess I forgot to go to Social Security”. If we had been married 6 months then that would be a valid excuse. She has been filing taxes for 12 years. So that means that for 12 years she has known that her name wasn’t changed. Does my name mean so little to her that she doesn’t bother to update anything? I told her that if it means so little that she just needs to go back to her maiden name and quit using mine. This hurts like hell. Where I grew up the last name meant a hell of a lot more than people from other areas would …

I know that this is a question that is often asked when our significant others learn about who we are and the real person that has been hidden away , often years before we come out to our SO or Family members ... So please share what about the family how has this affected the family?

Ok , you may not have been in a relationship where your partner had finally came to you in a broken state , attempting to clearly tell you about their life suffering or involved in : You went out Seaching for Some one you knew held that special quality about them , and You found and entered into a relationship with them , Because of who they were or was it because they had issue with or suffered from any verious form of Gender variance . Please tell us and the other SO's , what drew you to what society considers to be Taboo , or Wrong . Thanks and A Big Hug , You Are a Special Person we all would be Lucky to Know, and become friends with. Stephani

Simple yet not so simple as we find out and it starts becoming known to those around our circles ( significant others or family ) that it does affect how we are percieved by society .

What's It Like Growing Up With A Transgender Dad? Sharon Shattuck Knows Autostraddle "I think the one thing that really sticks with me from my childhood is that I felt very alone--I felt like no one else's family was like mine, so I just sequestered that part of my life and didn't talk about it with my friends or acquaintances." ...

Hi All; I am new to this page. I am hoping for some advice or just your thoughts on this topic. My husband likes pre-op trans. I have no issues with it (watching porn or being pegged). However, he has now asked to have a threesome. I am not into that, but he wants to find someone and have me watch. I want to support him. I do not want him with anyone else, regardless. I don't think its fair of me to not let him explore this side, but I am not sure how I will feel after. I am sure that he will like it and want to continue, how do I handle this situation. Please help!