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It's funny, but for the past several weeks or so, my female dressing has taken a minimalist phase. When my wife died, and all the flurry of activity that accompanies a death in the family quieted down, I went on a buying binge of sorts. I was aided by the girls in the chatroom, especially Andrea, but also Penelope and others on what exactly I needed to get. I also had my own wishlist and pretty much filled out a wardrobe of sorts. For the most part, I am happy with what I bought, and it is fun to see all my feminine wear hanging in my closet. But now, instead of spending my evening hours getting all dressed up and taking pictures and chatting, I am content to dress simply and read or watch some TV or catch up on my paperwork. I am also watching my budget, but even so, I don't have any great urge to buy any more at this point. I'm sure that will change, and I realize that I may come across something that I must absolutely have to have, but for now I'm content.

Feel transwomen, both pre-op and post-op, pre-HRT and post-HRT, are every bit a woman as I am, a cisgender woman. It's all about what's between the ears!

"To be content" is all that matters, whether it's wearing clothing or not, full time or intermittently, and what styles and so forth. The important thing, I think, is to recognize and accept that as a transgender person - not matter how you express your gender - is simply that you're a valid example of normal human diversity. You're certainly welcome here no matter what or how you express yourself or feel.

Well, the good news is that I (we) opened another account yesterday. This makes two for the week, three total so far. My "boss," Rich, is amazing. He can turn a no into a yes. I need to keep learning from him. We certainly don't get them all, and we have had our share of disappointments over that past several weeks. On a whim, after one such disappointment, he decided to try one more time on a prospect we had just about given up on. As luck would have it, we ran into the brother who is a partner in the business, and he has agreed to see us again on Monday. I'll bet we get another one. So, the result is that after about two and a half months, I'm finally seeing some money coming in. Even though these new accounts don't become effective until January 1, and AFLAC doesn't get any payment until February 15, I get paid immediately. We open the account one day, and the next day my commission is in the bank. Nice. I get most of it up front, and then the balance as the account does make monthly payments. I will also get residuals from the account as long as it is open. I need to keep doing this. As it stands, if I had gotten a "regular" job, after I had gotten laid off from my last job, I would have been much further ahead financially. To date, I don't think I'm even making minimum wage although that seems to be changing. On the other hand, I wasn't getting hired in education, and I wasn't getting any inteviews for other jobs. This was at least something. I also have to say that at my life stage, I like the fact that I don't set an alarm clock, and for the most part, I can set my own schedule. I also have control over where I work which means I'm not driving to hell and gone to get to work. Often, I can come home for lunch and let my puppies out--my neighbor does when I can't make it home--and still get my work done. All in all, I think I'm good where I'm at. I keep le

Cool for you! Yes, to watch your boss in action: priceless. You’ll get there kiddo. You certainly have the right attitude and drive. I think you’re gonna love the residuals! Edit: The thing you’re going to love more is that you’ll have so many more friends and acquaintances throughout your community. That is priceless.

Not sure how that happens. What I was trying to say is that I keep learning and working hard. The rest will follow.

My mentor, Rich, and I have been spending a lot of time together lately doing employer presentations on the appointments I have set. Admittedly, it has been a little disappointing. Those who looked to be good prospects have been playing hard to get and unwilling to commit. We can only do so much, and you do reach a point where it is time to move on. Then last week, on a whim, I stopped in again at the barber shop in our local strip center and finally caught the owner. I made an appointment with him and yesterday, Rich and I made our pitch. He talked to his barbers that day, and when I called him later that afternoon, we were a go for this morning. As the morning progressed, we were able to see all five in the shop and they all bought at least one policy. It wasn't a huge account, but a really successful one. The four guys and one gal were really nice, and the owner couldn't have been more accommodating. So, it goes to show that you never really know how things will work out. I also have a new place to get my hair cut. We had our office holiday party at Rosie's Bar and Grill in downtown Wilton Manors. It started at 5:00, but I didn't get there until a little after 6. I wanted to feed and walk the dogs before going and then I ran into construction traffic. It also took me a while to find it. I don't see really well at night, especially when it comes to reading address numbers and street signs. It turned out to be okay. I am getting to know everyone pretty well, and I can usually keep up my end of the conversation. We had a white elephant gift exchange. I have the worst luck with these things, but I always feel obliged to participate. I will make use of the Starbucks gift card, though. Anyway, I have a chance to open another account tomorrow with a dentist's office. We are still on. We'll see how it goes.

Attagirl Michelle! Yeah, sales is tough, harder than it looks. And that’s why the dollars are hung out there as incentive. But you’re amazing. You’re like the Duracell Bunny: you keep running. You’re exactly what we need!

People in Seattle take advantage of sunny/rain-free days and I'm no exception. I love walking from my house through a local park and then along Lake Washington for several miles. It's very large, with a total shoreline that's probably around 60-70 miles and of course I come no where near that. It's ringed with parks and walking/running paths and just lovely. Today I was talking with my wife (via phone) while walking. She's in California and has never seen me presenting authentically. She asked if I was wearing my "lady clothes" and I assured her that yes, that's what I always do. Today's no different. She asked me to have someone snap a photo and send it to her. So here it is: no makeup, hair's a mess, but it's me, very comfortable in my own skin. Wow, I just happened to notice that I joined TGGuide just over three years ago. What a long space trip it's been!

You look great. I walk my dogs around the neighborhood, but I really need to take advantage of our parks and do some hiking in a more natural setting. Being in nature is so rewarding and fulfilling.

The weather is certainly brisk at times (it's 32 this morning according to iPhone) but I recall it was 50 when I was on my walk. I do tend to keep my hands in the pullover's pocket but overall, so long as I keep moving, I'm fine once I build up some warmth. Several days earlier it was in the low 40s and I wore a cap pulled down over my ears, a scarf, and a warmer jacket. The weather is one of the things I love here: I get to wear my cozy clothing!

Nice to see you out enjoying life! Looks like you're dressed kind of light for the weather lately. You aren't cold?

You both raise excellent points, thank you. As I ponder this more I suspect that as I’m still so early in my transition that I’m a little shy about unequivocally believing and stating that I am a woman. All I can say is I’m Working On It!

Hi Chrissy and Emma, First of all, kudos to Chrissy for her role as organizer/moderator of such an important topic. I enjoyed your discussion although I was at a disadvantage of not having seen the videos. What it means to be a woman is probably at the heart of feminism and being trans. In my way of thinking, a woman is a woman, no matter the way she got that way. And yes, as a former English teacher, language does evolve or we'd still be speaking old English or something even less understandable to us moderns. This whole line of thinking goes along with the article I just read about Hiroshi Ishiguro who is making autonomous human-like robots. His background is in art, and he considers himself an artist who creates and represents what he observes and feels--in this case, what makes a human, a human. His robots are getting so close to acting and responding like people. This is deep and heavy stuff to be sure. But what is the essence of a woman, or a man, or a human being for that matter? For now, I have to say, we are who we are, and leave it at that.

A couple of months ago while driving north in Oregon I thought of a custom license plate for me: "EMMAGINE." Unfortunately the DMV only accepts 7 characters or fewer so I dropped an M. I love it!

Very clever, Emma... always finding new and creative ways, big and small, to continue becoming or bringing out the most real you.

Congratulations, Aunt Emma. You will be an amazing Auntie I know.

Thank you! I think it's too cool for school. This may sound silly but for me it's like another step in coming out and being authentically me, fun (I hope) and a little creative. No, I'm not from New York. I've only visited a handful of times. I'm a native Californian who moved to Seattle last summer. Washington is so amazing. Of course I hate the traffic but that encourages me to walk or use the light rail. On Saturday I drove less than an hour from my home to visit my niece and her young family who live on a small lake in a beautiful woodsy area. In California that drive would be a lot longer to get away from the urban areas. Another thing from Saturday: now I'm known as Aunt Emma! I'm very proud of that.

I love it too. I didn't know you were from Washington. I thought New York.