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Showing content with the highest reputation on 01/21/2020 in all areas

  1. Somewhere in one of my blog entries, I commented that to stop learning means you stop living because learning is a lifelong process. Last nite, I had been trying to help another member figure out how to apply what I soon discovered is called a "Feature Photo." It's the image you can apply to a specific blog entry (totally seperate from your blog banner image), which also shows up in the blog index page. After I figured it out and shared that info with the other member, I went thru my own blog like a kid in a candy store, creating and downloading images based on entry topics and applying them. While doing so, I also read a few of my old blog entries as some of them have been here a while collecting dust...LOL. As I read over some of those old blog entries, something jumped out at me, and I didn't like it. My use of the term "gays." It made me think of the fact that, so often, we (me included) have gently chastised some for calling trans people "transgenders," advised them of better terminology, and explained to them why some terms are unfavourable or demeaning. I also thought about the members of this board who are gay or lesbian, and wondered if my words had hurt them. It occurred to me that I can hardly "educate" people how to speak about or address trans people if I myself am guilty of doing basically the same thing by calling gay men/- people, "gays." I thought about going thru those blogs containing the word and editing to something more appropriate, but I changed my mind. I think I have grown...and just as we like to see positive changes in others, I decided I wanted others to see that I have grown and taken on positive changes. Therefore, for anyone who runs across any of my older blog entries that contain the word "gays" instead of something like gay men, or gay people, I apologize for having been not only insensative, but also ignorant. Continuing to learn not only means continuing to live, it also means continuing to improve. David Michael
    2 points
  2. I agree that with language intention is important, it was less than two years ago that I started learning a whole host of new terms and words as I started questioning who I was and why I liked to dress as I do. Some of things I read needed a dictionary to translate, technical terms can become an insulator that allow people to belong to certain cliques, because if you are not in the know then you cannot be "in". I regret my casual flinging of insults as a teen, but I know that I would never knowingly hurt someone by using a term derogatorily now, whereas I live around people that have used the terms their whole lives and genuinely still think nothing of it. 🤷‍♀️
    2 points
  3. I was reading the comments under an article that indicated [trans]men were no longer welcome at the Michigan Womyn's Music Festival (MichFest) - that is the first time I've ever heard of this. Many are well aware of the fact that [trans]men were welcome at the Fest (though I fail to understand why any guy would wanna go) because, bluntly, we aren't considered men by too many of the women who attend that festival. Pretty much like [trans]women aren't considered women by that same bunch. So I went a-googlin', trying to find out when [trans]men became undesirable guests of the almighty cisgender (keep that term in mind ) femi-nazi Fest. I ran across a blog by a [trans?]woman who pointed out why no guy should ever wanna be a part of/attend the MichFest. Then I read a wiki article about the Fest, but there was nothing in it about [trans]men no longer being welcome. In continuing to try to find something that clearly indicated the MichFest now bars [trans]men too, I was sidetracked when I ran across an article (about the Fest) that indicated how many gay people dislike the non-word, "cisgender," in part because it "bears an uncomfortable resemblance to the anti-gay slur "sissy."1 I couldn't help but snort out an unsympathetic grunt-like chuckle. I try to give the benefit of the doubt. I try not to lump people all in one big pot. But if this is true, I wondered, are some [cisgender] gay/lesbian people really worse than what I thought? They dislike the word "cisgender," a term that was simply coined to distinguish trans from non-trans and never intended to be demeaning, yet there are those like Ru Paul who will sling around the word "tranny," and others who use the term "shemale," all under their entitled attitudes that it is their right to use those terms whether they hurt us or not? REALLY? Are some gay/lesbian people incapable of looking at how "cisgender" was derived, and why? When is the last time you've heard someone call a non-trans person (gay or straight), a "cissy?" Understandable why gays wouldn't like that word, but, it's not intended for just gays. And when it is abreviated, it's always as "cis," not "cissy." Sounds to me like they are trying to drum up the use of "cissy" so they can have something to throw in our faces. It seems to me, that if gays/lesbians dislike the term "cisgender" so much, they would stop and think how a real/realized and true* slur feels to us. Slurs that people use with intention...intention that is rarely, if ever, good. *"Tranny" is in the dictionary. Unfortunately, the definition does not speak to the desparaging connotation that is intended when one is referring to another's gender identity2. "Cisgender" is not in the dictionary (yet), but it's creation was born simply as a way to distinguish - not demean - coined by science.3 "Shemale" is also not in the dictionary, but has historically been used to degrade, demean, and to shame. Seems to me that CISgender gays/lesbians, like their straight counter-parts, need to get over themselves, their entitement, their whining and their hating. The combo... Is. Not. Pretty. -David Michael 1 John Aravosis (NOTE: link removed - discovered suspicious re-direct 01.19.2020) 2 Merriam-Webster online 3 Wikipedia
    1 point
  4. Michael, Indeed, live and learn, my friend. I’d guess we’ve all been there, done that, and have similar regrets. Love, Emma
    1 point
  5. Dear Mike, Thank you for your patience in teaching me how to set up my images on my Blog. You can be sure I will pass it on. Would be grateful if you would put this information in the Forums, as I know many others would welcome this information. Have myself referred to transgender people as "transgenders," in the not too distant past, and to Gay people as "gays," as well. The reality is that language changes through the years. Mike, what counts is intention although I hope everyone would welcome correction, so they can keep their use of language up to date. Love learning and passing it on. Yes, we learn for a lifetime! Gratefully yours, Monica
    1 point
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