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Hi there Monica, Stephanie, and Emma Funny enough, my breast size is somewhere in between my sisters sizes. Bigger then my oldest that has my body structure (not height but size wise in comparison to height), and smaller then my sister slightly older (the frumpier one). Hey, they two fatties at birth are the two skinnies in adult. The relative skinnies at birth are the fat children now, how I love not being their sizes, because my brother is slightly taller then me and around 50% heavier. Wouldn't look right on me. But then again I'm in my stronger phases of saying. Sexy, super sexy model looks. Have a wonderful and awe inspiring day ladies. As nothing compares to who you were as a dead shell and now. Hugs Michele

So, while it's been a while since I've opened any accounts and made any money, it seems that I am continuing to be groomed for a management position. I was invited to a higher level training at our market office this afternoon which was attended by veteran agents and managers for the most part. My regional manager also wants me to start attending monthly leadership training. This is all well and good, but as I think I mentioned before, my district manager (and I) are most concerned with my livelihood. His wife is back in the hospital with a urinary tract infection from her recent surgery, so I have had to help out. Maybe it's called paying it forward. Anyway, I am still due to have coffee with him on Saturday. We'll see what he says. And in the meanwhile, I have painted my toenails a kind of dusty rose. I think I still like deep red better, but this isn't bad.

Dear MichelleLea and Emma, It takes time to ferret out others' INTENTIONS. Ideally it would be great if everyone strived for a "win - win" situation. As for me, I would take every class offered to me to train and cross-train. Just watch to be sure he doesn't have a hidden agenda and that he treats you respectfully. Your friend, Monica

Good, go have coffee, and bond a little more. At the end of the day, though, somehow you need to do what’s best for you. I’d be wary of him feeding your ego, maybe by sending you to the classes. Sure, he wouldn’t if he thought you might somehow embarrass him. And yes, you might someday hit a winning streak and make good money. In the meantime you need to decide if it’s time to ignore you’re sunk costs and move on. It’s a very hard decision I know. Perhaps when you have coffee, spell this all out frankly with him: what would he do and why? Maybe he’ll give you info and wisdom you don’t have. Or, you may find yourself not believing him. Or somewhere in between. All of that info will help you decide what to do.

Not sure I have the Spanish spelling right. I saw the sign on a vendor's cart in a Mexican market, and it stuck with me. Much effort, and little gain. All of our team seems to like working with me. My district manager's wife has been pretty sick, so I have been helping him out with the training, but I feel like I'm getting spread pretty thin. I am having coffee with him this Saturday. He wants me to succeed so maybe we can sort this out. Otherwise, I'm free floating. Not sure I'm ready for a relationship yet. I'm in no hurry or in any great need at this point. "When the right one comes along..."

Not that it matters, according to Google Translate it's "La eterna lucha." For fun what we used to exchange with our Mexican colleagues was this: "Mucho trabajo, poco dinero." Also an eternal struggle for most. Be careful you don't burn yourself out or get filled with resentments that add complications to making decisions and generally make us feel miserable. Do things for yourself even it's just grabbing a cup of coffee and reading a book or magazine. Take breaks, cook up something unusual or special. Go for a long walk. Write in a journal! Any or all of the above. I know what you mean about being unsure about relationships. I recently met a lesbian woman who I feel head over heels with. She likes me a lot too. As much as I'd love to date her she told me that I am too femme for her so we'll stay as close friends. Disappointing but I'm also grateful to have her for a close friend.

I think it was Adele Davis. I read her book a long time ago. Her nutritional advice has been greatly superceded since then.

Hiya Michele, and Emma, and Monica. Michele and I do converse elsewhere, as well as on here, and We can talk quite openly. Michele, You have already blossomed into the most Beautiful Butterfly ! If People do Not see You, for the Beautiful Young Lady, that You already are, then they must be blind ! You are a Terrific Young Lady, and someone Who I Am Very Proud, to call My Friend !! Emma, You are also doing Fabulously. I too have got to get Laser or Electrolysis, done on My Face ! ( I was about to sort it out, when I had A Cancer Scare, and I was having Scan's, and other Medical Appointment's ! Fortunately, I have been given " The All Clear " !! What a Relief, that was !! ). Monica, Everyone is a Different Shape and Size, to each other ! The Motto of My Comment is, That We ARE All Different, but, there are so many similarities between US as well ! All 4 of Us, have known Each Other on here, for quite some time now, indeed I have been on TGGuide since Mid--July, 2015, and this is A Wonderful Community, and the 3 of You, are so Lovely to Know ! Enjoy the Rest of Your Day Girl's, Take Care Girl's because I Care, And My Very Best Wishes, And Lots of Love Girl's, Stephanie. ( Steph53 ).

Dear Michele, Please let me respond . . . My looks - I focus on finding my voice, both physically and emotionally. Am a woman of size, so I work on feeling that people of all sizes and shapes are beautiful! 😉 Will I be loved for whom I am? - Always am seeking having a PURPOSE, that is, what can I contribute to my loved ones and community? 😊 Does my life matter? - Of course, your life and mine DOES matter, otherwise our Higher Power would not permit us to be on Earth. 😇 Do others like me? - Focus on having a FEW good, quality friends instead of winning a popularity contest. As for my family, I consider the T/LGBT community my family. The painful reality is that I can not make anyone like or love me. Even if I could, I wouldn't even try. 😄 Take your time to FIRST find a supportive therapist, support group and save up to attend the nearest transgender conference. Likely, your cup size will be one cup smaller than your mother's and sisters. 😯 With the right surgeon, your vagina will be indistinguishable from that of a cisgender woman's, so much so, that a gynecologist wouldn't be able to tell the difference! Have seen the vaginas of two post open transwomen (not sexually), and I could not tell the difference! 😷 As you get older, you will be less obsessed about these things, as I have! 😊 Michele, don't forget you have many friends right here, and you'll make even more (face to face) friends as you gain self-confidence. Don't forget you are going through a second (female) adolescence as you transition. 😃 Your friend, Monica

Truer words were never spoken Michele. Like you I finally attain - if only for limited time - a lack of concern about how the rest of the world perceives me. Achieving this more consistently seems so hard. It's hard to be trans, especially if like you and I, we transition. It's been particularly hard the last two days. You see, I have an appointment tomorrow in Chicago for "large volume electrolysis" where two electrologists will work simultaneously to clear my facial hair in one very long 12-hour day. They require that I have not shaved for at least 4-5 days so as you can imagine by yesterday my facial hair was quite noticeable to anyone who looked at me as I travelled from Seattle to Chicago. Today I'm holed up in a hotel room trying to survive on one rather expensive chicken salad from room service along with some nuts and instant oatmeal I brought with me. I can't stand the feeling of this beard and would be mightily tempted to shave it off if I'd brought a shaver and shave creme. Thankfully I didn't! About breast growth, I understand that too of course. I've taken to using a Noogleberry pump system morning and evening for about 45 minutes each time. I guess they're growing but it's hard to be sure. Even if they are I don't know whether they are the result of hormones, Noogleberry, or both. I plan on "Noogling" through the end of 2018 at least in the hopes of at least full B's. You wrote: "People will.only be honestly happy for me if I'm honestly happy for myself." I believe that to be true too. In general I am pretty darned happy these days and I'm finding that people around me pick up on that and are happy with for for me right back! Best wishes, Emma