UsernameOptional

:lol: I'm sorry, ladies.... I was trying to catch up on blog entries I've not read, and I ran up on this one. I couldn't help but laugh. Of course, that was after I sorta squinched a little after reading "waxed" and "arm pits" in the same sentence. All I could think of was that has GOT to hurt. Then it got funny again.... all this over a little hair. Okay. Sorry. :::hangs head and leaves::: Sorry...

I don't have any jewelry ideas... but I have a suggestion --- if you have a Hobby Lobby nearby somewhere, you might want to compare prices before you buy everything in Walmart. While Wally World does have a lot of things cheaper than in other stores, Hobby Lobby is a hobby store and so may stock many craft items cheaper. I used to do a lot of Native American bead work. I bought probably 98% of my supplies from Hobby Lobby. I don't do much bead work now, but for any project I dream up...I usually head to HL.* It may also be worthwhile to check online for some items. I don't know anything about jewelry making...but if there is any item that you would use a lot of, you may be able to get that item in bulk, and it could turn out to be cheaper in the longer. The less you have to spend, the better prices you can offer, the more you can make. -Michael *Yeah, HL is that great little company that apparently doesn't have a whole lotta love for those of us in the TGLB community. Unfortunately however, as a wanna-be-artist, HL is the only place in my area that has a good selection of art and craft materials at a decent price. :(

I have often thought, that if there just wasn't the crap on my chest, I could deal with this much, MUCH better. I understand your frustration, your disgust, your anger. My own frustration, digust and anger has been increased over the past 7 to 10 years because I've unfortunately gained weight. And of course, we know what happens to the chest when ya gain weight. Then I sit here and think of the days when I was nice and muscular. My calves were hard as bricks and my shoulders and neck were all built up - and that was just due to my occupation. And then go get some to eat. Yeah. They suck.

Very well written - no reason someone on the outside looking in couldn't understand these delineations. Goes to show that many who don't see it, or claim not to understand, don't because they choose not to.

"Upon requesting a change of nametag, I were told that the H.R. woman would have to ask my supervisor/head chef about it first." Does H.R. always defer to supervisors on personnel matters? What is H.R. for if they cannot make such a call? "...he denied my request. That until I get my name legally changed....he refuses to allow me to have my name tag changed. A non-binding piece of plastic...something that would make next to no difference in the world to anyone but me...but he said no." This to me speaks LOUDLY to his close-minded attitude in my opinion, and possibly even his until now unrealiized bigotry. So now... does this mean that "Mike" and "Jen" and "Hank" and "Lucy" will be issued new name tags with their full, formal, given birthnames of "Michael," "Jennifer," "Henry" and "Lucille?" If not... why? "...he has decided to start calling me Ren whilest at work, instead of my feminine name." It will be interesting to see how this is met with your boss- will he demand that your b/f address you by the name on your name tag? Will he mandate that all nicknames are henceforth not allowed in the workplace? "...eventually I'm going to legally have his Middle name in his honor". To which my older sister replied "Yeah because you'll never have his gender, no matter what you do." and she laughed about it." I'm so glad I never had a [older] sister. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=70TGisBTPlE, dude. -Mike

Congrats Emma. I am glad to hear that your first meeting went so well, and that the people involved are good people. Considering some have been in the group for so long, some of the people could end up being long time friends. Hopefully one day, your wife will decide to check out one of the meetings with you. Do you think there will be any unwanted, or not-yet-ready-for ripple affects from the restaurant manager recognizing you and seeing you the group? -Michael

I really don't think you have anything to be embarrassed about. The friend that pointed out that it's all about her preference, comfort and desires is, in my opinion, speaking honestly, but her honesty was honed by what's accepted/not accepted by current society. She doesn't know any better. I truly believe it all boils down to what people are programmed to believe and accept. We live in a world where, for the most part, only two sexes are recognized. Therefore, only two genders are recognized. And consequently, gender must match sex. But if the binary theory were to stop being crammed down peoples' throats from the day they were born, and people accepted and recognized that any variation and combination of sexes and genders are possible and normal, when a person's gender discord or variance came to light, it would be looked upon as just another change in one's life that simply needs incorporating into any relationship, whether familial, intimate or social. Hence, "no big deal." P.S. Bashing not allowed.

Congrats, Karen.. WTG!! LOL... I dunno how you can be so calm. I believe I'd try to do backflips out of the DMV after they handed me my corrected DL.

Truthfully, I've never understood this business of "reclaiming" something. It was never "ours" to begin with. In order to reclaim something, it had to have been yours from the start, then it was taken away. Instead, it (and all other slurs) belonged to the people who intended to hurt with such terms. For all those who prefer to use derrogatory terms and slurs in an effort to take the air out of the sails of those who mean them in a hurtful way... more power to ya's. I really don't think the people who mean it in a hurtful way give a good flip about any group allegedly "reclaiming" a word. The people who don't like any person belonging to any particular group are going to continue to use those terms whenever they want or feel they can get away with it. Personally, I don't believe any person belonging to any group should sink to using the very terms that others intend as demeaning, devaluing, discrediting and dehumanizing. But that's just my opinion. -Michael

Congrats, Karen.. :)

When I wrote that, I was most likely suffering a round of mild depression, and as is clearly indicated - self pity. I think today is the first time I've read it since it was first posted. Sorta surprised me how raw it sounds - I do not normally open that door. Sorta disappointing that I'm still stirring in that drink. Sorta sad that anyone else feels the same way. We need to push away from the bar.... -Michael

Ya know, over time, my g/f has still remained my "pillar" of sorts. In fact, there have been a few times she has gotten on me because I've said or implied something that she felt was a little close-minded on my part concerning our community. Gotta love a woman who can keep ya in line. :lol:

Yep...lemonade. He's a better man than I. No one, but NO ONE, is gonna tell someone else they can drive MY vehicle. Nooooooooooooooooo. That would not have flown. I can't say here what I would have done with those lemons to the person who had the unmitigated gall to decide who would drive my truck. Glad to hear there's been no cutting episodes... WTG

I've said it before, and I'll say it again... I do believe it is this board that has kept me from totally losing it at times. ;)

"So I caught myself talking to myself in the bathroom again the other day, and forced myself to stop. So now I'm gonna be all self-conscious about this and everything... curse you, Warren!! " --Sara :lol:

"I think we all do it at least a little bit. But I still say that it is mostly girls who do it" I agree. I found a way to make the binder work better...I can PM ya with details if you'd like. -Mike

Seems to me Karen deserves the money back - ALL the money back, 'cause she did all the work the way I see it. I should try to sue the woman for the injury to my jaw when it hit my desk after I read the part about her wanting another $300 AFTER Karen had to fill out all that paperwork! But maybe I just dunno much about lawyers and how they work. Good job, Karen... WTG! -Michael

Good luck. If you are willing to share it, I would like to hear how she took it (no pressure, though, and it's fine if you don't want to). I'd also be curious if her attitude changed any. -Michael P.S. I still think it's her job to get you to a point where you can even begin to tackle some of these things. But I'm proud of you for having come up with the list that you did.

I don't even know what to say. I've never been to a therapist...but I thought therapists were supposed to help you figure out things. I would think that not knowing what to expect, or knowing what kind of goals you should set would give them a clue as to how to approach your issues, and then get you in a frame of mind so that you can declare those things. But... I dunno. I think I wouldn't be too happy about tone of today's session either. -Michael

After I came out to my brother, he said it suddenly became clear to him where my anger comes from. It's not that I walk around angry all the time...but when something triggers it, I guess it's either pretty bad, or at the very least, pretty obvious. And it seems only since I've gotten older, that I have a little more patience for some things. I've heard of others indicate that they were angry all the time prior to transition or publicly/generally coming out. So it's highly likely that it is indeed the conflict between physical sex and gender identity, or the lack of recognition and acceptance (by those you've come out to), or the inability to live as your true self, or any combination of these things, that pave the way for your anger. I agree with Emma.. you definitely need to continue seeing your therapist. And flipping the bird at the world helps. Just make sure you don't flip it at someone who's liable to be angrier than you...and decides to try and seperate you from your finger... -Michael

"And I should just say... my strange sense of humour got a chuckle out of the fact that a posting titled "Serenity Now!" received its first comment from someone named Serenity! " --Sara ... me too!

I hate boobs. Of any variety. Well, except the ones attached to the ladies... but I digress and this is not the place for that discussion! Welcome to TGG... -Michael

I'm sure this will not be something your wife will want to hear, but "transgender" is a term that has been used to just gather all of us into one big happy family. It includes crossdressers, transsexuals, gender-fluid, gender outlaws, androgynous, etc., etc., etc. It's my understanding the term was originally coined because it sounded better than "transsexual." But technically, anyone who has identified with the opposite sex, whether they've come out to anyone or not, whether they are able to transition or not, whether they are able to under-go gender-confirming surgery or not, is transsexual. And to the best of my knowledge, there is nothing that says if a person chooses not to transition, that that makes them not transsexual. I suppose however, that for the time it's fine to tell her you are "just transgender." But I can't help but think this is sorta like some guys who tell people they are lesbians, and then when they finally do tell someone they are really trans (FTM), it's like people totally Sybil-out on them. Just sorta seems like it's worse coming out "the second time around." -Michael

This reminds me of a poem-rant I wrote once when I was ticked with the world, angry enough at the time to chew 16-penny nails. All I could do was hammer on the keyboard. Anything else would have landed me in jail...