Significant Others

This forum was started specifically for our significant others. Please feel free to invite your spouse, domestic partner or lover here to join our discussions. It could be interesting to see other points of view. I'm giving this forum a little extra publicity on our Twitter page as well as the home page of TGGuide. We can definitely use your help to spread the word! :)

Hello , And WELCOME to the Newest Members of the Forum The Significant Others , I wanted to make a personal and Hopefully Helpful Starting point for those who are truelly Significan in our lives , so I am Adding this section For the Sole Purpose For the Significant Others To Meet one another . As You may have noticed this Forum and the other Forums are here for Learning , Growing , Understanding , And Supporting , and on occasion a great time of silly banter . I hope this becomes a large community of Loving and Supportive Members as well , we all find that we need a shoulder to cry on , an ear to listen to us when we have concerns , and a guiding answer to the Press…

I'm probably in the wrong place and I truly don't want to offend anyone here but I am a straight male married to a FTM and looking for some advice/support/insight/peace while I struggle with my relationship. My spouse may be on this forum and I'd prefer to keep him from knowing my growing sense of crisis regarding our marriage. I looked for support groups for spouses of FTMs but they appear to be inactive or rarely used. Kick me out if I'm in the wrong place. Any help would be appreciated. Nice to meet you.

Generaly a wife club for there opinions I am seriously in need of some type of support group for my partner to help her understand more about as to what G.I.D realy is and what it means,

I have been an out and proud lesbian for well over a decade. I was set up with my now husband on a blind date that described him as female with facial hair. I literally stumbled when we were introduced because he was clearly male. After hearing him out, I decided that this person was kind and gentle with awesome intentions and a huge heart. We began to see one another as friends, eventually developed a relationship and 4 years later, legally wed. He had already been on testosterone therapy almost a decade when I met him. That said, he is very male appearing. I love him, I truly do. He is in his early 50s, pre-op and has plans on top surgery but perfectly happy wit…

HI I am 32 years old. I am now in a relationship with a FtM transsexual. This is my first time dealing with some one like this but i have been in a relationship with both man and women. Here lies the problem we are bumping in to. He is very man with him self and with others that have came be for me. I don't know if its what he went after only stright chicks i am his frist Bi. He tell me i don't understand what he is going though and maybe i don't i trully want to but every time i try to get in he pushes away. He has alot of pain and i just want to get him some help or some one to talk to to let him know there are others out there dealing with this too!! So if any one can …

If you found a support group in your area please share so many Significant Others Dont know were to turn and if you found support in an area others may live close to they might bennefit from your leed . Was it a local LBGT center , a group , a church that is LBGT friendly and supportive , did you start a support network for those in the area .

Hi. I'm new to the board, and I'm a transwife. My husband is pre-op, pre-T. We were legally same-sex married this year. He's planning on beginning the physical transition within the next 18 months. Once his name changes on his birth certificate, our marriage license will no longer be accurate. Do you know how this affects our marital status? Can any of you point me to links or resources that might help us figure out how to handle this particular set of legalities? Thanks in advance for your assistance!

When J told me he wanted to become a she, I was at a loss for how to react to what he was telling me. As I believed us both to be heterosexual, it brought up many different thoughts ranging from "Is J gay?" "Who can I talk to for information and guidance in my situation?" to questioning my own sexuality and sexual preference, to "how would we be viewed by society?" and, probably the most uncertain.....the biggest question: "How was this going to effect our personal relationship?" I had so many questions!!! We had a number of challenges....there wasn't just one. But my greatest challenge came in finding information and support, and the journey I took to discover…

Ok , a starter subject , You have all of a sudden Just been told , or recently have been told : I am Trans,Gender Variant , Bi , A-sexual , InterSexed , Any of these and so many more , Please , For those Who have been told this and have found a way to make it work , please share , what the heck you thought , what happened during the course leading up till now , the Highs The Lows , So many want to know the other side of the coin , we can all set here all day and night speculating and guessing , Yet in no way will we know just how this effected , every aspect of your lives together , and Yours , Because you Are truell the Special Person , who through all odds has made t…

Ok , Now that I have your attention : Lets get down to the nitty , Gritty , and the Dirty of it : Have you used your relationship status as a leverage to maintain control over your SO ? If so Why ? What was the Out come ? What were your true intentions? Why would You expect them to Do such a thing ? What thing did You ask and expect of them? I ask this because in any relationship no matter if it be Hedero , Gay , Bi , or any other type there always seems to be a time when the partner uses tactics to force and issue , idea , or action from them to get their way , have You ever done such a thing or Has Your SO done such a thing , lets talk about it , we all know…

Simple yet not so simple as we find out and it starts becoming known to those around our circles ( significant others or family ) that it does affect how we are percieved by society .

Ok , you may not have been in a relationship where your partner had finally came to you in a broken state , attempting to clearly tell you about their life suffering or involved in : You went out Seaching for Some one you knew held that special quality about them , and You found and entered into a relationship with them , Because of who they were or was it because they had issue with or suffered from any verious form of Gender variance . Please tell us and the other SO's , what drew you to what society considers to be Taboo , or Wrong . Thanks and A Big Hug , You Are a Special Person we all would be Lucky to Know, and become friends with. Stephani

I know that this is a question that is often asked when our significant others learn about who we are and the real person that has been hidden away , often years before we come out to our SO or Family members ... So please share what about the family how has this affected the family?

Hi everyone, I was pondering this question and wanted to hear some oppinions. I know I may get responses like "only you know your wife" but I just would like to hear some guesses or assumptions based on personal experiences or your own oppinions. This isn't my first time putting myself out there online about this sort of problem...it's my second time but my first experience seemed to be filled with negativity. Also a little warning I may need to talk a little about fetishes to give the full story. I guess some background is important: Ever since sophmore year in high school I started to identify as "wanting to be a girl, and a lesbian unfairly put in a man's body", no…

What's It Like Growing Up With A Transgender Dad? Sharon Shattuck Knows Autostraddle "I think the one thing that really sticks with me from my childhood is that I felt very alone--I felt like no one else's family was like mine, so I just sequestered that part of my life and didn't talk about it with my friends or acquaintances." ...

I'm a mostly-closeted lesbian (not out to family or totally out within my community) married (second marriage) married to a wonderful, loving MTF who still mostly presents publicly as male (but not all the time). I'm not really ready to introduce myself in the general forums yet, but wanted to say hello here as a spouse. I will continue to read the forums and hope to contribute to the conversations!

In this post I am really interested in knowing what questions ran through a spouse's mind or that they asked out loud within the first month or two after their spouse came out to them and informed them of their being transgender or transsexual. Rest assure that I can pretty much guarantee you that if you had/have a question them someone else has had it before you and someone else in the future will also have it after you. From the questions that spouses/significant others of transsexuals or a transgender person post as comments to this entry, I will research to find as much information relative to and really do hope I can find the answers to them for you as well as for …

Here I am 58 yr old CD/TV who lives with his aging mother who has dementia and drinking problem and deep financial problems, trying to keep my wits and sanity while trying to dress up and meet others but life throws me a curve and have to attend to the financial matters more often.This makes my drive to dress up, I have to always come down from my upstairs room to either switch the TV mode to DVD or troubleshoot the remote control from the mute button which switches the TV to another mode which is a problem. My sanity is on trial, My brother is no help with him being out of state in Colorado. What am I supposed to do?

I just found this article on Huffington Post and liked it a lot: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/georgia-kolias/the-secret-to-staying-together_b_6379276.html?utm_hp_ref=transgender Here's the closing paragraph which has, at least for me, some real wisdom: "The secret to staying together is staying together, but more than that it is caring enough to see the world through someone else's eyes and saying, I see you. Not just the bluster or hubris, but the soft core inside that is oftentimes hidden from the harshness of the world. I see you." Isn't that nice? I need to remember that. Perhaps we all do. We all have a soft core inside that is at times vulnerable and sca…

Recently, a hetero cisgender asked me the above question. I remembered questioning my relationship with J. As a hetero cisgender partner to a man who transitioned M2F, his transition caused me to question my own sexual preference. I struggled with societal views and judgments, and wondered how I would be perceived in the relationship if I stayed. I wondered what our sexual relationship would be like on the other side of J's transition. My comment to her question follows based on my own experience. If you are a heterosexual female, and "he" becomes "she" your sex life will change. You may find yourself in a lesbian sexual relationship. Do you wonder, like I did, th…

Hi All; I am new to this page. I am hoping for some advice or just your thoughts on this topic. My husband likes pre-op trans. I have no issues with it (watching porn or being pegged). However, he has now asked to have a threesome. I am not into that, but he wants to find someone and have me watch. I want to support him. I do not want him with anyone else, regardless. I don't think its fair of me to not let him explore this side, but I am not sure how I will feel after. I am sure that he will like it and want to continue, how do I handle this situation. Please help!

Although I do not intend on transitioning from male to female I do present as female most of the time and do consider myself as transgender. My wife goes through these moments where she is grieving the loss of the "man" she married even though I am not dead and have no intention of having my penis removed. Have any of you suffered through this same or similar issue? How did you cope with it? Before anyone asks, yes we are going to couples therapy.

In this post I would like to start of by having anyone that is transsexual or cissexual and who is willing to participate in my research with the topic of "The Process of Transitioning for Significant Others of Transsexuals" please (1) give me the basic (without names or using fictitious names) description of the type of relationship you are/were involved in, (2) the gender of each partner (trans-partner has pre transition and post transition/gender identified as listed), (3) sexual orientation of both partners (pre and post transition listed if different), (4) years together (pre marriage/civil union and years married/civil" union), (5) whether or not you and your part…

Hello, I'm not really very good at this and am not overly confident in how I'm supposed to start. I'm a 44 year old female who just discovered her husband's gender confusion two weeks ago. He did not tell me, and in fact had actively misled me when I ran into things that made me ask earlier, so it was kind of really confusing for me and traumatic in that he had always insisted on openness and not doing my keeping people out to protect myself, and assured me I had the same. I had the anger phase about why he lied to me about it for so long, especially when I'd approached him in as non-threatening ways as i could, but I let that go as it's not helping anyone. I worked t…