eveannessant

Happy Birthday to Nikki, and get in that kitchen and rattle them pots and pans...............

Good Luck Chrissy.

And happy 1st Anniversary.

Cheers

Eve

Yes Emma, I did think about that, I 'spose that really it's left versus right wing politics just the same as it is in the UK, no matter what your gender or sexuality is. Except the toilet issue thing, which is unforgivable. Very glad that you're Democrat, I think it's fairly obvious to all that I'm a Labour party member.

Briannah, it was pretty much exactly as you describe on the show. I don't really care what anyone else's political beliefs are, as long as they don't impinge on others, the toilet issue does though, & I guess the others in the group expected Cait to be trans before Republican, which if she was, she would have complained bitterly about not being able to use the female toilets, no matter that she's Republican.

There were a couple of really hot trans girls on the show, and they were sensible too............Canit, I like it!

Oh, you're with your twin sister again! Is she the same twin sister as in the photo posted last year? I think you were at a party or similar event? Yeah, you're looking good !

Cheers,

Eve

As always a thought provoking entry from you Jay, no-one took much notice of my pieces regarding my transition either, so why did I bother! Well it was because I felt the need to do so at that stage of my transition, in the first 2 months of real life experience, looking back it was probably because it was such a big step, yeah, RLE is a massive step to take. So it felt to me like I was justifying my transition..................

Seems to me like you've pretty much just come through a similar thing?

Glad you've gotten rid of your writers block, and if you want? - I'd love to read your Trans articles, I'm curious to see if there are any differences and similarities of thought between F to M and M to F. 

Cheers Eve

Well thanks for your comment Nikki, I didn't realise that you weren't on HRT. This throws my previous comment into a bit of doubt, when I started transitioning as a cross dresser or transvestite if you prefer, I went to a bar in Birmingham (UK) every 1st and 3rd Monday evening of a month, a group called "Outskirts" met there and it was a place where I built up courage, picked up tips etc from others, whom I made friends with. Not all of those friends went any further than cross dressing, which I know they still do, and they still dress ultra girly, and use lots of make up. I progressed through to HRT and living full time as female, it's HRT that changes the way you think and act. Point is that those early friends behaviour hasn't changed, so please take my previous comments about Bree's entry with a pinch of salt................sorry. I'm not advocating that you should change your mind regarding not taking HRT either, it's your life to do with as you wish, you only get one shot at it, shame there isn't a practice or dry run................

Cheers,

Eve

Hmmm, there is an initial huge attraction to the girly side of femininity when first transitioning, at least that what I found, look at it like a small girl wanting to be grown up. It's a phase that I passed through, and as you actually do grow up as a new female you do begin to see the other myriad aspects of femininity, a lot of which is quite everyday humdrum, the desire to be ultra girly all the time subsides, and surfaces at times which is useful for special occasions. I well remember people talking to me in my early stages of transition about all of this, and yes I had a blank stare too!

Long term don't worry. I'm still married to a beautiful cis woman, the same one that I married when I was male. We get along fine and still love each other.

Cheers,

Eve 

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I've never met up with anyone from any site, some of those who I know on Facebook I knew previously, however I have wanted to, but other things just seem to get in the way, I think it's called life ! but I should make more of an effort......... 

Cheers,

Eve

Veronica, I had no idea about your ancestry, how fabulous to have that extra wisdom passed on to you, added to your knowledge of the "western world" - for want of a better term. So, similar to my posting, very few people will have that extra knowledge, I guess the trick is to use it in a modern day setting, with modern language so that all the "ignorant" (I use the term ignorant without any malice) people out there can start to understand it?

Karen, thanks for your comment, nice of you to say so, as you've probably guessed my post was an extension of thought from your recent posting & my earlier posts. We learn in small steps at a time, but we don't individually have to climb every step, others can climb some of the steps for us, I think this is called teamwork or collaboration or something similar...........

Cheers both,

Eve

I agree with all that Karen has said, I felt similar after about 18 - 20 months on hormones, and can add that mind changes carry on changing after 3 years. Tastes change, emotions continue to intensify, yes V, I too even when I was male used to get upset watching killings etcetera on the TV, but hormones really intensify emotions, I've also noticed that I'm much more tolerant, and I think more restful or peaceful too. I'm much more prepared to watch soaps now than before,  previously this always seemed to me to be a female thing........

I suspect that as I carry on along my chosen path I'll find that changes will continue to happen, it's all part of growing up!

Amazing how little time it takes for the procedure, compared with the time one has to wait to become eligible for it, hope you get what you want with the surgeon of your choice. 

I well remember that elated great feeling (it must be about 4 years ago now?) when I walked away from Worcester Hospital after being diagnosed after a second opinion as having Gynecomastia (male breast growth). I was elated, "wow I'm going to have - no I've got boobs - fantastic". The Pueraria Mirifica (plant estrogen) that I had been taking had worked. It was shortly after that, I told my GP that I wanted to start the gender change pathway on the NHS, the rest is recent history as told in earlier blog entries.

Point is I found having boobs to be a real milepost on the pathway to becoming who I wanted to be, I'm sure it must be similar for you too Chrissy, hope you have a celebration...................

Thanks for that info Karen, it's pretty much what I thought it'd be. I'll be sure to ask your advice if - no when!, I visit the US. I guess I'll need to keep clear of the "red neck" areas..........

But then there are areas in the UK where it's not as easy as others, generally most of the big cities are OK, but I'd not be so sure that going out to country farming areas would be so liberally minded, but then again I was ok on country walks up the Severn valley, but it's pretty much a tourist area, and a lot of city folks have moved there.

I wondered who the photo was of ! You looked gorgeous! But where was the location that was so unforgiving, and is the location any more forgiving now?

I had my nails gelled for months, but I have to warn that although at first I had beautiful girly nails, the continual coating of my nails eventually made them very weak, and ruined them, after a friends advice I then used OPI nail envy, (strengthener) for sensitive and peeling nails (the orange labelled one), well that initially helped, then it made my nails peel or de-laminate if your prefer, so I now don't put anything on my nails, they need a rest and fresh air.

Now if anyone else has a sure fire remedy for nice strong nails, I'd be very interested in trying it, but also very wary of it. 

Yes, many trans over here have had to fully transition after divorce or divorce is the result of full transition, in any event many separate, but there are some who don't........I think many cis women want to separate because they don't want the social stigma of being thought of as Lesbian........ Not that being LGBT is as much of a social stigma as it used to be, attitudes are changing fast, and I suspect that more who transition in the future will stay married. 

Hi Karen,  this is an interesting topic.

Maybelle (M) and I are still together and against all the odds she is not only supportive, but also states that I need to get my GRS surgery done soon, I feel that I'm very - no - extremely lucky to have such a wonderful marriage. I also personally know of another girl who has just had her surgery completed, and is still married. OK, HRT causes physical change, thinking differently, softer more forgiving and easygoing personalities (in many cases), but our inner values are unchanged, perhaps albeit displayed slightly differently.

We shouldn't confuse love with lust and sexuality they're separate issues...............Sexuality? yes, that can change for some, formerly heterosexual males do not always become trans lesbians, many seem to become bisexual, but I don't know of many who change completely to heterosexual transwomen. Males that were formally gay however, now are happy to be hetero transwomen.

What of cis women? well they're curious creatures, whom I now understand a whole lot better since 4 years of gradual transition and HRT, and realise that they're all different, I'm looking forward to Valentines Day with my M...................and spending the remainder of my life with her.

Cheers,

Eve

Looking unaproachable as a male has much resonance with myself, your first paragraph pretty much parallels my experience.............So glad I transitioned, it was such a relief, I hated myself, I just couldn't carry on living like that.

Yes I too have always liked them. But the tory shepherds over here are purposefully re-arranging the public sector, setting up it up to fail, so that they can say that the public sector has failed, (and the media will really chime in with that message) privatisation is the only way to make things work.................

To quote a citizen of your country, not long after he was a subject of my country;

"Democracy is two wolves and a sheep deciding what to have for diner. Liberty is a well armed sheep."

Benjamin Franklin.

I think his theory is basically still true today, however things are now a little more complicated.

There needs to be a "don't like this" thingy to click really, as your posting is depressing, and I feel very sorry for you. I think you have the right idea of hanging on until after surgery, when shortly afterwards I'd be inclined to stick two fingers up at the Dean and Co, or is one finger more derogatory in the US?

Yes Emma it is easier to cry when on HRT, and I often feel the need to do so when I see something sad on the TV, however I still instinctively try to bottle it up, I don't plan to do that I just don't let go unless it so sad that I can't help myself. I know some trans girls can burst into tears for no reason at all whilst walking down the road, but hey ho we're not all identical in all respects. Likewise HRT can effect us all differently, not only with differing dosages but also in how we physically and mentally change, never has there been a truer saying than just be yourself !

Thanks Veronica, hope you're looking forward to your wonderful journey, mines been amazing so far, and it's the things that I hadn't thought about that I found the most amazing.

Hugs,

Eve

Yes even after 3 years of oestrogen and 15 months of decapeptyl, I still fight the urge to cry, such is the power of societal conditioning. It's so hard to instantly change one's sub-conscious values, that have been learnt over such a long period of time.....................................................

Chrissy is good, I've already used it in one of my comments, I really like it, it sounds nice.

Yeah, I too never thought that I was a girl trapped in a boys body, well you've read my past history anyway, but it's when I reflect and look back. that I can see that many of the signs that others have spoken about were there, but I never thought about it as GD, I just thought it was a fetish. I guess male social conditioning made me think that way............ Secrets are a burden and my secret made me unhappy, I'm so glad that I'm now free of it. But what of the future? I have learned that secrets are a burden so I don't want to ever deny that I'm trans..........if I do I'll probably be unhappy again.

So glad that you've progressed into happiness,

xoxo (I still can't help thinking this is some kind of stock cube!)

Eve

Yes, Ebbing and Flowing, how I remember that, there's no need for embarrassment, I suspect many before have experienced it, for me the tides have slowed and almost disappeared, but it took time and hormones to achieve this within a stable environment.

So, now "batting for the other side" as my partner once put it, I can say that it's a very much more peaceful and interesting life, there's not much that I miss about my former existence when in the "other team', this I found to be unexpected, but also welcome.

To put it into nautical terms it's like seeing a severe storm brewing up slowly for a long time, going through some extremely rough, choppy and confused waters with huge waves of consequences all around you, to then come through the storm and find that the waters are calming down, eventually to find flat waters and calm sailing. I should leave nautical explanations to Veronica really ...........

Anyway we're all here for you, so put your best foot forward and get going..............................

Eve xx