eveannessant

Maybe I'll have to edit and change the title to good night instead of good bye. Anyway it's late here, I've had too much cote du rhone, and so I'll bid you all good night my friends or bon nuit, mes amis. Eve

Christie you're a gem! who'd have believed (outside of the US) an American saying that! To be honest it's dawned on me over the last 18 months or so that capitalism is failing. To my mind it's because it's gone too far, it seems as if we need to go back or forward to a mixed economy, but one that is in synch with other countries in the "western world", no single country can do it alone (however I suppose one must try and lead). Mixed economy? one where the infrastructure of a nation supports both free enterprise and society at large. Infrastructure? public transport, utilities, defence, legal system*, health, & social services. Free Enterprise? the rest, surely there's enough scope there for those who want follow free enterprise, and progress society with technological advances, I'd hate to stop people from doing that, in fact although I'm somewhat democractic socialist in my beliefs, I admire free enterprise when it's not spoon fed with easy government contracts for public services. Take care my friend, Eve x

Ok, I'm thinking about it, after having painted myself into a corner.................!........I'm not so sure that we get much more support from Government than you do, remember we have a Tory Government, usually that means paying lip service to any laws or services that they don't like or really approve of. NHS, yes well, we all have to pay automatcally in taxes and National Insurance contributions automatically deducted from our pay packets for whatever medical treatments that are required by anyone. Deductions at source amount to aproximately a third of our gross pay, so treatment is not free. Perhaps a voluntary insurance scheme which includes Gender Identity issues done on a mutual non-profit making basis would be a good answer for countries without an NHS, except that many folk don't realise that they have these issues until later in life, and so likely wouldn't have made any contributions. But isn't this the case for heart attack, stroke, appendicitis or any other illness? If you have equality laws how do the medical insurance companies dodge them? Does someone need to start a campaign? Cheers, Eve

Last entry, I promise and I'll shut up forever after. Christie, I recall friends telling me to tone down my dress sense when I first started out on my journey, because I wouldn't "fit in", I too cringed at that point in time, I thought that dressing the way I did was a major driver behind who I had become, I remember saying that "I don't want to look like someone elses mum". Change was inevitable, oestrogen changes all sorts of things, not all of which are physical, I have already commented in one of my earlier blog entries "things I didn't see coming" about my taste buds having changed, i.e., no longer liking beer and unable to eat hot chilli flavours without my tongue catching fire, taste in dress sense is also something that changes. When I look back Isee now that when I first starting dressing in female attire, I was dressing as my male self thought a female should dress, yes I was envious of the opposite gender being able to wear short skirts revealing tops and long boots. But not many women actually wear that sort of attire every day, maybe for a party or to see a band or similar occassionally, but not to go to the supermarket, or out for a days shopping, or out to visit a tourist attraction. Wearing those sort of clothes is bound to attract attention and close scrutiny, which is uncomfortable, which is why most women don't often wear that sort of attire. To look authentic, in my view is "to fit in or blend in", view it as camoflage, now if in NYC women do wear leather mini skirts, revealing tops and thigh boots, my wearing them might blend in with the background (except I'm probably too old now). But over here it is not the case unless in circumstances that I have already described. I think it boils down to do you want to look like a real woman, or do you want to look like what your male self has thought a woman should look like for all those wasted years? It took me a long time to realise this two and a half years with oestrogen, followed by another 8 months of oestrogen combined with testosterone blockers, they are indeed as Karen has said in one of her past entries, "a game changer". Cheers, Eve

I know I said Goodbye in my last entry, but I still get alerts, and when I read this entry I felt so compelled to comment because it so very closely describes my journey to Transwoman. Leaving behind the outrageous leather minis and over the knee high heeled boots, and moved on to dressing as a woman does, so that I "fit in". I don't think about my appearance 24 hours a day anymore, just enjoying life as me. Well said Karen.

To all of you, thank-you for your kind words, I have always thought of you as kindred spirits and friends, I also never ever had any misgivings about nationalities, and will miss you all, I will look in every now again, if any of you want to stay in touch please feel free to send me a message. With a lump in my throat, so long, Eve

I've made the decision to stop blogging on this site, there are two reasons for this the first is I have run out of things to say that have any real trans relevance, because living life as a trans woman has become so normal after my transition 8 months ago and taking oestrogen for over two and a half years. The second reason is, I suspect that many UK trans issues are different from within the US where most of the site membership seems to belong to. This is evidenced by the lack of comments and likes from some quarters to my comments and blog entries, this lends a rather parochial appearance in my eyes. To those of you who who do not fit that description, I am sorry to be leaving, and I'll miss you. Eve

I really hope that you have a good appointment with your "endo". I hope that Caitlins show will be broadcast over here or available on Netflix soon.................we have had another couple of tv journals about Kellie Maloney in the interim. Cheers, Eve

Christie, Thanks for your comment. I have two brothers, one accepts me for who I am, the other and his wife don't accept me I have spoken to him only twice in the last 3 years and not at all to his wife. But I can't say that this really bothers me much, I'm doing my thing and they're doing theirs, it doesn't impact on me, and as far as I can tell doesn't impact on them. Making demands / Adjusting their actions; do they not see that they are persuing their own interests / demands to the detriment of others? How does a M to F trans person affect them detrimentally by your using the female rest room? (I presume this term means toilets?) I'm not sure about the US version of toilets, but I strongly suspect that they are no different than in the UK, (Newark airport are the same as here anyway) women do not parade around outside the cubicles with their knickers down, possibly due to anatomical differences causing urinals to be absent from female toilets! Cheers, Eve

Monica, but it's not just good manners, more than that it's courtesy too, Embassies are only extensions of foreign governments and relay their own countries foreign policies to host nations. What is much more important is the Forieign Departments of Governments that create policies that might not be helpful to others....................

Karen, Monica, sorry to disagree with you both. You look so much younger as a female than in your male photo ! I do however presume that you have not had tatoo removal, and that you are in fact the guy looking straight ahead at the camera? Your face has changed so much...............and in my opion for the better too! By the way, curiosity got the better of me and I followed the link and came out as true androgyne, however I'd suggest that the test might be ok for cis lesbians, but it can't really take into account past male experiences such as mechanical engineering and the ability to do things for yourself, I can fix most things mechanical or electrical, I used to do it for a living in my 20's and 30's. I'd have thought that my persona is more femme than recorded. Anyway I'd have described myself as pragmatic first and foremost.....................

I had weird dreams recently, but a theme from one of them has stuck in my head. It seems to me to be appropriate for most, it's "I will use my individual freedoms to my desired extent, without impinging on the freedoms of others", I think that this used to be called "good manners", but it's much more than just saying please and thank-you, and have a nice day too. It's more about how can I do what I want, and aid others too where I can. How much smoother the world would be if everyone adopted these thoughts. Imagine you're on a busy motorway, would it not be easier to pull over to the nearside lane to allow others to pass at a greater speed, would it also be better if those travelling at a higher speed asked themselves if it was safe to travel faster in a given scenario, or how they might achieve a faster speed whilst not endangering others? I guess a more appropriate example here would be something like, how can I help others with what I have gone through, whilst recording my experience for my own sake, and at the same time doing what I want to do ( Transitioning, cross dressing, androgenuity? is that a word lol), or how do I transition and help others to understand me, or help them to adjust to me? I wonder if the Foriegn Departments of Governments have such thoughts before acting, or if they just think it's good for our country, don't worry about others? Cheers, Eve

A highly informative blog, good to be informed of your thoughts and feelings as you felt them (telling it as it is!), please post more.

Karen, this is a very emotional blog entry to even read, it must have been so very sad to write it.......................but thank you for doing so. We are often so wrapped up in our own lives that we don't see what is happening to others who are dear to us.

Looking your age. You know, it seems to me, that Transitioning does make you look younger than your real age, peope have also told me similar as you have said Karen, and when my close friends show me pictures of their former male selves they always look a lot older than their present feminine selves, even myself who as a rather sceptical "it'll never happen" person have to admit when looking at old photo's of me I am shocked at how much older I looked at that time. A strange phenomena indeed............... Or did you always look young? Glad someones having a summer anyway, it seems to be Autumn here already! Cheers, Eve

Christie, I was referring to her expression, or are you being even more humerous with your reply LoL

Yeah, I'm intrigued, please show them. You're absolutely correct about the colour of a persons skin being unimportant to a trans person, in the UK anyway, lets face it there's beauty either way. Cheers Eve

I've been wondering just what to write about for almost two weeks now, life just seems to be so normal now, even though I'm doing things that I never used to do. My transitioning seems to have activated a bit of an activist streak in me, I joine LGBT Labour nearly a year ago just before presenting full time en femme. LGBT Labour is not part of the UK Labour Party, but supports and advises the Labour Party on LGBT issues, and policy contents. A couple of months ago I joined the Labour Party proper too, my wife was already a member. Last week we attended our Local Constituency Labour Party meeting, we had both feared that we wouldn't enjoy it, but much to our surprise we did and we found that there were others out there that shared our particular views. On Tuesday this week I went along to the West Midlands local office of my Union, the General, Municipal and Boilermakers Union (GMB), they had invited members along with friends and families to a film night, I took my close trans friend Sharon along with me. There was a very friendly welcome from all who attended and to our surprise there were snacks, beer, wine and soft drinks supplied by the Union. We settled watching the film called "Pride", for those of you who haven't seen this Brit film, it's set in the 1980's when our miners went out on a prolonged strike, and were opposed by the Thatcher led Tory (Conservative) Government, a group of lesbian and gay people in London, had the idea of supporting the miners and started collecting for them, they had to overcome the normal hostilities from the miners, toward non white straight people then prevalent in UK society. They eventully achieved this and long lasting friendships were made between a south Welsh mining village and the group of gays and lesbians from London. Eventually after the strike had ended the south Welsh miners turned out en-masse in support of the 1985 London Gay Pride event. Their union the National Union of Mineworkers (NUM), massively helped gay rights to be adopted by the Labour Party soon afterwards. So in the UK, LGBT rights can be traced back to the events shown in the film, and interestingly to me, when I first joined LGBT Labour I was told that it had evolved from being called Lesbians and Gays in Support of the Miners. The film ending was quite emotional, my friend cried and my eye watered - yes just the one! LoL. I am proud to be a member of LGBT Labour, and the next big challenge is to get full equality within same sex marriage, for trans people such as myself, who were (and remain) married when in their cis gender to a member of the opposite gender e.g. a man to a woman. Presently in the UK if I want to get a Gender Recognition Certificate (GRC), which changes my birth certificate from male to female, I'd first have to divorce my wife and then re-marry once I have the GRC. An absolutely typical British legal system balls - up, straight out of an cormy old black and white Ealing comedy film.............If you don't push, shout and fight for something, you won't get it, that's history, and that's Pride! Anyway enough of my democratic socialist politics!, I'm off with my wife tomorrow for my Step-Son's graduation from Sheffield University, he's now a Master of Engineering with Honours (MENG (hons)), I now call him Meng the Merciless, which is how he behaved when fooling around and playing practical jokes, as he grew up, not that I was any saint either, but that's another story.................... Cheers all, Eve

Have you just trodden on your friends toes!

You look like twins! So glad that you're "fitting in" so well. Males, on the whole. do seem to be more "anti" than cis females in my experience. However, not exclusively.

Hi Karen, I'm a little dissapointed that there seems so many US places that are allegedly transphobic, glad that most of you who blog on TG Guide seem to be ok though. I love the slogan at the end of your entry. When I was last in Luxembourg my friend from The Hague selected a tee shirt for me, which I purchased. I wasn't too sure in which context to take the meaning the slogan which when worn is emblazened across my boobs, but I chose to take the generic meaning rather than the saucy version LoL, however it's so similar to the slogan at the end of your entry, I hope that you don't mind my showing the photo below, and I'd also add that transitioning isn't easy...............and in my case was definately worth doing !................ Cheers, Eve

Likewise, and are you one year old or zero years old LoL !

Yeah, we can be a fractious lot!, but that's not just us, it's people at large! Eve

Roxanne, As above comments, plus I was 55 when I first came out to my wife, it's been gradual since, but I am now totally Eve & 59. I well remember the pleasure I felt getting rid of my male clothes. I hope that you have a good appointment with the Doctor you mentioned and that you have a productive session with your Endocrinologist, I found oestrogen wonderful, and testosterone blockers to be a truly amazing "game changer". But a word of caution, please , please be sure it's what you want, it doesn't take long with this treatment to reach the "point of no return". Good Luck & Cheers, Eve

Dear Warren Esquire, Really glad your life is changing direction in a way that YOU wanted it to, I hope your new job goes well. Cheers, Eve