Used to have on here that I was a closet CD. It's much more accurate to state that I'm a woman inside and have now accepted that although I am struggling with how to deal with it. Wife does not know and I don't want her to know. Live in Texas. Have to worry about my external life and realistically don't see myself transitioning although I know it would help me mentally. Would love to add a photo, but due to circumstances can only use a neck down picture and that's not allowed here.

I feel that wearing woman's clothing is just a normal extension of my inner feelings and having bigger boobs isn't a fetish, it's something that feels natural to me and looks acceptable because of my build. I don't think of myself as having any male parts and wish I was born that way. Don't like the term transgender as it implies that I'm something other than totally female, but understand that it's the used description. of my situation.

I joined this site to talk to others that are in a similar situation as it is very lonely to be living my life even with a wonderful spouse. Trying to get over the depression, eating disorders and other manifestations of trying to be female and look and act that way while having to live as a male in my external world.

The sexual aspect of this is just an extension of being a woman. Much like other women, I have fantasies; some romantic, some sensual, some sexual and some wild.

And now for something completely different; hobbies include model railroading, biking, playing ice hockey and running.